Thanks for asking...

Hi Wonder Mom! Thanks for asking...

I felt OK about Brianna leaving. We'd been away from her before, but my parents had come to our house. This was her first sleepover at someone else's house. I must have told her I loved her about 50 times, and reminded her that I'd see her tomorrow about 30! I was a little choked up when I drove away with an empty car, but looking back, I was more worried about how she'd handle it than I was upset that she was away.

My folks said she handled it really well, until the drive back to our house. Then, in her 3 year old mind, the drive was just too long. I guess when your 3, 90 minutes feels like 900. She was very clingy when she got home but it was TOTALLY worth it!

SOOO much fun

This weekend, Brianna spent her first annual weekend with my parents. They partied and had a great time! (Next year, my folks will take both kids! OH, the anticipation!)

Even still, with just Grant this weekend, it was very liberating. Saturday.... shopping BY MYSELF. Moms out there, you understand right? When was the last time you spent all afternoon shopping BY YOURSELF!?

Sunday- I took Grant with me to Toys-R-Us. He's young enough that I can buy presents for him and he won't realize it still.... I had SO. MUCH. FUN. I just wandered the aisles picking up what I wanted, until before I knew it, an hour and a half had gone by and there just wasn't any more room in, or under, the cart. Grant was even holding/playing with one of his toys already!

People, this is why being a parent is even more fun than being a kid. Not only did I get to wander and buy to my heart's content, in just one short week I will get to see the beautiful faces of my children open all those toys. Even if they promptly forget about them as each new wonderful packages is torn to shreds, I will remember the joy I felt making them happy.

Wahoo!!!!

ALL DAY yesterday, my work computer was blocking blogger beta as inappropriate content!
And I was sincerely attempting to waste my entire work day yesterday so I would have greatly appreciated being able to work on and post my photo essays I'm developing!

Today, I am trying to work... so the pictures will have to wait another day. Or maybe I'll stop working before my silly computer blocks this again....

Hmmmmm.....

A photo of my hair

but not my best self-photography....

It's the little things

My son, my wonderful 14 month old son, has started making connections. This is such a fun phase to watch.

This week, I was putting on his coat to take him home from daycare, and he started waving good bye! No one had to tell him to wave, he just knew that when the coat comes on, we leave. I was very touched by it. He is growing up very fast. Now that he is walking, he finally seems to have a personality. He's a touch of a drama king, but it's him.

On that note; file this under "bad mommy".
My son doesn't wear a coat most days. He has a coat, I just don't put it on him. Instead, I put him in a hoodie. In my defense, it's a warm hoodie. AND- I really am looking out for his safety. His real coat is very huge, very puffy. SO puffy, he doesn't fit in his carseat! Yes, ok, I know, I could uninstall his carseat and adjust the straps in the back. But I haven't. It's cold outside, it was in the single digits last week!... I know, thats exactly why I should do it, he needs the coat. And now I have gone in a little circle! I'm a bad mommy running in circles!

I am so horrible at posting!

Things that have happened since my last post:

1. I am actually feeling better after about a week of more medication than I'd like to admit!

2. Grant does nothing but walk now. Seriously, the kid doesn't even stop to play with toys most of the time. He just walks around the house in circles to practice. I hope I can get him to give half this dedication to school or an instrument someday! Now we just need some talking...

3. Brianna is a constant crank. She is in a "do-it yourself" phase. Anything we try and do with her/for her, she freaks out and has some version of a temper tantrum. I won't elaborate, it's too painful.

4. We went bowling with my entire family as a holiday celebration. Bri loved it, Grant only wanted to get down and walk, I suck at bowling, but it was fun. Enough said.

5. I CHOPPED OFF my hair! My hair was quite long, middle of my back-ish, it is now somewhere between chin and shoulder. I did not cry, I actually couldn't stop smiling. I decided that I'm going to be 30 next week. 3.0. people! It was time to give up my ponytail for a while. I love the change but I'm not ruling out the chance that I'll go back someday. I sort of miss my ponytail....

I am working on a photo essay regarding all of the above, but it might be a couple days....

Geico has it all wrong

Neanderthal man should leave Geico alone and sue me today!

With my messy hair (got up late, Thanks Nyquil!), mouth breathing (no thanks to Dayquil), and raspy voice... Today I am a neaderthal woman! Good think I'm teaching about the stone age, I'll just call it part of the lesson.

I feel a sick day coming on....

'Tis the Season

My mom always says 'tis. She even used to call us "Tizylish" but I don't really know what that means and it isn't what I'd planned on talking about today...

I love December!

I love the snow in December. (I hate it in Jan and Feb but that too is a different story.) My Birthday is in December, the 22nd, just in case.... you know. But I especially love all the family and decorating and hot cocoa and lights.

This weekend, we put up our brand new 8ft tree! It looks amazing, and was super easy thanks to the whole pre-lit thing. Even putting on the ornaments only took about 30 minutes. We were lucky enough to have the wonderful help of a 3 year old dynamo and were not impeded too much by the 1 year old fuss-budget. Brianna loved hanging ornaments on the back of the tree. I'm not sure but I think she liked saying excuse me and squezing by her parents as much as possible. We don't quite have enough ornaments for the new, bigger, tree but that was ok because we can't put anything at the bottom anyway. Grant will just break it or eat it!

I haven't yet put out any of the rest of my decorations, but all the boxes are just sitting in my living room waiting for me. I am a little obsessed with snowmen. By the end of this week, every decoratable surface of my first floor will be covered with snowmen, women, children, and families. This really works for me. Adam was raised Jewish, I was raised Protestant, we haven't really settled on an organized religion yet for our family but we celebrate both faiths. Snowmen are religion neutral. And they TOTALLY work in northern Illinois where winters are full of snow.

I do however draw the line at snowman/seasonal sweaters! I'm 30 people, not 300!

For Hannakah this year, my mother-in-law bought me a very nice, soft sweater... covered in snowflakes and polar bears. I love that she tried to buy me clothes. I love that she even remembered the turtleneck to go under the sweater. I do however plan on returning the sweater. Howard, Heather... please don't tell her, it just isn't necessary. I think I'll share more faux Hanukkah info later.

Later this week I'm planning a photo montage of my best and worst things about December...

and where did my spell check button go?

Holiday Meme

Janet over at Dancing Through is a new site I've found. Her blog really appeals to me because she is a mom with a toddler, and refers everything back to dancing. I haven't actually found yet if she is a former dancer, but I like to think so.

She found a Holiday Meme and I decided to jump on the bandwagon!

1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate? Hot chocolate

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree? For now, Presents are wrapped and go under the tree as soon as they are ready. Grandma and Grandpa take care of the surprise gifts. I can't wait to see how this changes for us over the next few years though.

3. Colored lights on tree/house or white? I like White for me, I love to see color on other peoples houses. I CAN'T STAND IT when people mix the two. Sue me, I'm crazy like that.

4. Do you hang mistletoe? Nope, The only person worth kissing doesn't believe in mistletoe so why bother.

5. When do you put your decorations up? I would like to do them the day after Thanksgiving but if you know me... you know I'm just not that organized even if I were home that day.

6.. What is your favorite holiday dish? I love anything chocolate... or the green bean casserole... and of course the mashed potatoes.

7. Favorite Holiday memory as a child? Making cookies or candies to give to our teachers and neighbors. We always snuck just enough candy to keep from being sick, but way to many to want dinner.

8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa? I wish I remembered... I hope it's a very long time before my children do!

9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve? We open one gift each from my mom aka Grandma Julie. She always buys us pajamas to wear for Christmas morning. Lately the PJs have coordinated with the kids and I just adore the little family pictures of all of us wearing them!

10. How do you decorate your Christmas Tree? The lights are already on the tree... one less fight! We have all memory ornaments from my childhood or from our marriage. I love the family look, no matchy matchy for me!

11. Snow! Love it OR DREAD IT ?? Love the first snow fall... until I have to drive in it, or when it gets all muddy or footprinty.

12. Can you ice skate? A little, we did take lessons as kids but Jamie was much more interested than me.

13. Do you remember your favorite gift? Not really, each year there was a favorite... topped by another favorite the next year. If I had to pick one, it was the year my parents agreed to pay for my airfare to S. Carolina so I could attend a wedding for one of Adam's best friends. This was a big step for my parents who firmly believe that sex is for marriage and that traveling with a boyfriend is "dangerous".

14. What's the most important thing about the Holidays for you? Cozy times at home as a family.

15. What is your favorite Holiday Dessert? The little peanut butter balls dipped in chocolate that my mom makes.

16. Which do you prefer giving or Receiving? Giving, but receiving is fun too!

17. What is your favorite Christmas Song? Silent Night, it reminds me of the reason for the season and has a comforting melody.

18. Candy canes? Only the fruit flavored ones.

frustration

I really don't have time to post now... because I've spent every chance I had, times I wanted to be posting, fighting with Google and Blogger Beta to find the right log in combination. I think I have it now but don't have actual time to write actual interesting information.

I should never have switched to Beta!

The Circus!

We had such a great time at the circus a couple weekends ago. I didn't actually take any pictures of circus stuff because, well, I don't really care about those people, I care about these people:
Brianna and Grant hugging during intermission in Pop Pop's lap. (see Daddy trying to get out of the frame?)



Brianna was a little afraid when we first arrived but quickly fell in love with the circus. Here is Brianna and Grandma oohing over something.


Grant and his favorite part of the night, clapping! He actually was close to sleeping after intermission. It was really cute... he would be super cuddly and have just closed his eyes, then something big would happen and everyone would clap. He would pop up and clap with everyone, then try and settle into sleep as soon as it was done.

Where does the time go?

It is an old question, and one that I seem to ask myself a lot.

Grant, my baby, is a toddler. He is trying to walk. He only drinks from a sippy cup, and that cup, holds real milk instead of formula (well, soy milk due to his alergy). He eats table food. We are donating all our remaining jars of baby food to a food pantry this holiday season. (I overstocked just a little!) He likes all bread products and bread like products, meatballs, chicken nuggets, soy/veggie cheese, bananas, and applesauce. We can't get him to eat veggies but we keep trying and I'm going to start slipping baby vitamins into his milk once a day. I don't know how he manages it all with only 2 teeth, but he's amazing.

Daily, I look at my kids and wonder where the time went. I am especially hard hit when I have to put away the outfits they outgrow after wearing once, or not wearing at all. I save all those... just in case.

This is a dangerous phase for me. I don't have a baby anymore, and my little one is not yet toddler enough to be difficult. It's this phase that I think about another one. And Adam checks my pills daily! (just kidding, but he might consider it!) I'm not ready for another baby now, but I want one, someday. But that, is another story for another YEAR!

Congratulations, It's about Dang time!

Britney has filed for a divorce from Kevin.

Congratulations Brit. I am proud of you and know you will do better with out him. Next time, think about your children when you pick a husband. You should have known he was a dog when he wasn't faithful to Char or his children with her. Why did you think you would be different?

Way to go!

My baby is a teenager in disguise

It has been an interesting start to the week with Ms. Brianna. Did you know that she is 3 now? What no one tells you is that 3 is WAY worse than 2! It might be terrible 2 but it's dreadfully, very bad, appalling 3. She knows what is wrong, and that is why she does things. She chooses to intentionally do the things she knows are wrong. Sorry readers of children who are not yet 3... this is typical and it will happen to you too!

Monday, I picked the kids up from school at normal time in the normal way. She put on her coat, she waved goodbye to her friends, we started driving. Somewhere in the first five minutes, we argued because I told her she couldn't take off her shoes and socks. Sometime not long after that, we argued because she wanted to take off her seatbelt. And then because she couldn't take off her coat. And then she started yelling at me.

I calmly and quietly told her that if she didn't stop yelling, she would be in Time out when we got home. She stopped yelling, for a minute or so.

And then it happened, loudly but not yelling, she said "I don't want to go home, I don't want to go to time out, I want to stay at school." She said it again.... and again... and like 25 times after that. Always in the same angry loud but not yelling voice. I wish you could hear it! BUT... that's not the topper... when she finally realized I was not going to respond, she repeated it one more time with a little addition tacked on the end...
"I don't want to go home, I don't want to go to time out, I want to stay at school. Those are your choices mommy!"

I swear I thought I would pee my pants from holding in the laughter! I barely was able to drive the car with the tears in my eyes. I giggle even now, days later.

Tuesday was a completely different little girl. She had her first Gymnastics class with out a parent in the room! We have been doing parent-tot gymnastics for over a year but this was her first class where mommy watched from the observation room instead of helping out with the class. I would be lying if I said I didn't get a little emotional. The start was a little rough. We'd been talking about this for over a week but she clung to me and wouldn't participate. After 15 minutes, she waved at me and blew kisses but still wouldn't do most of what they asked. Finally at 30 min. through the 45 min. class she was back to her old self. I really hope next week goes better. I think I'll make daddy go!

I am just a little sick

I am a planner!

Today I was having a discussion with some friends about divorce rates. We figured that out of the 4 of us, at least one of us would be getting divorced at some time... probably 2 of us if averages hold.

I revealed the fact that while I've never thought about divorcing Adam, at least not seriously, I have seriously made plans in case he dies. I know that this is a stupid thing to do. Adam is a safe driver, doesn't fly much, and is relatively healthy despite recent events.

Still...
If Adam dies, I will:
1. Ask for help from my parents and his to pay off my house. I don't like the thought of groveling but I could never afford the house alone.
2. Apply for assistant principal positions immediately. Right now, I only take home about $1000 a month after you subtract daycare from my take home pay! Can't raise 2 kids on that.
3. I would marry again. Not right away of course but eventually. I am not good at being alone.

Is this sick?

I think it's especially sick that my children might someday read this...
But I am who I am!

Life in the twilight zone

Today:

-I worked at work, most of the day anyway.
-Both kids were awake before we had to wake them up.
-One of the two kids woke up happy and was actually smiling when we walked in her room AND was willing to potty and get herself dressed without argument!
-I didn't spend too much money on lunch/food.
-I got done all the things I set out to do.

I think the life Karma is waiting to really hit me where it hurts....
Waiting.....

Celebrity Best Friends?

Reese and Ryan are splitting.

I am very sad. I always found a lot of connections between Reese and myself.
- We both met and married young.
- We actually got married the same year.
- We have 2 kids.
- She grew up in the midwest (Nashville).
- We are about the same age.

If I had to pick one celebrity to be best friends with, I always thought it would be Reese.

What about you? What celebrity do you connect with most?

Just one moment

My life is full of stress, and some days I thrive in it. I really try and take joy from what I do. Even when I can't find the joy in something, I know that tonight, I'm going to take my beautiful children in my arms and they will love me unconditionally. Grant will snuggle in my neck as he's falling asleep and Brianna will see how hard she can hug me and we will both giggle.

I don't feel that I am a great writer. I am fine, but I will never be able to use my own words to truly make my feelings known. So, today I'm going to borrow someone else's words.

Yesterday, this song really touched me. I had a average to bad day at work, and 2 cranky kids, and spent over $80 buying almost nothing at the grocery store, But this song was me, is me.

Some people think I'm crazy
But try to understand
I get satisfaction
Out of everything I can
The losers and the winners
The laughter and the tears
The noises of the day to day
Is music to my ears
And I like it
Yeah I like it, whooa

Gonna live it up this time
And dance like the song is never ending
Gonna get so high tonight
You won't be able to bring me down
Cause I like it
Yeah, I like it

Driving down the highway
The wind is in my hair
And if I hit a traffic jam
I swear that I won't care
Living the lows
Makes the highs that much higher
And the sun will shine through
The smoke and fire of love
Whooa, love
Whooa

Gonna ride this merry-go-round
And dance like the night is never ending
Gonna get so high on life

You won't be able to bring me down
Cause I like it
Yeah, I like it
Oh, baby, I like it
Whooa, I like it

A sea couldn't wash away
The happiness I've come to find since love
Has taught me how to break
Break these chains that hold me back

Noisy streets and the sleepy bars
And the neon signs and the rusty cars
How many nights have I wondered how
One goes through life without seeing the beauty of love
Whooa, the beauty of love
Whooa

Gonna live it up in this town
And dance like the song is never ending
Gonna get so high tonight
You won't be able to bring me down

And I like it
Yeah, I like it
Whooa, baby, I like it
Oh, yeah, I like it

(That's the beauty of life)

Artist: Dixie Chicks Album: Taking The Long Way Title: I Like It

The Halloween Parade!

Brianna, looking all cool, TOTALLY excited to see mommy in the middle of the day:




Grant, totally adorable, at least until he noticed me and started WAILING!!!!

Worst mommy in the world... or the best?

Wednesday I was called away from work again to pick up a sick child. This time it was Brianna. She was running a minor fever and was just very lethargic. I took her home. She stayed home Thursday with Adam, partly because she was still not herself, partly because the daycare center makes you keep them home for 24 hrs after a fever. By last night she was begging to run around and play so we let her attend her normally scheduled gymnastics class. She did great!

However, around bed time last night I noticed she was running a low fever again. I think we let her over do it! I really should have kept her home from school today. I didn't. I gave her Tylenol before bed, and again right before school, and I have my fingers crossed that she will make it through her day. The worst mommy in the world, right? I sent my sick kid to school where she could be miserable... not to mention possibly passing along her bug.

BUT... don't get out the electric chair yet! Today at school was her Halloween parade and party. She has been talking about showing her friends her Cinderella dress for W.E.E.K.S. And I was so excited that I got a friend to sub for one of my classes today so I could run over there and take pictures of the parade. I just couldn't make her stay home today. Best mommy in the world?

I'll settle for somewhere in between.

Funny Funny Funny

Check out this ad.


(you don't have to pay to watch the ad, only to download it.)

The HAT!

One more picture of Grant's general attitude during the festivities.

Thanks for the hat Aunt Judy!

Birthday Pics!

Grant and his Dairy Free cupcake lovingly baked by Mom!



Grant after Mom took away his Binky to eat cupcake!
I hope it wasn't a reflection on my cooking!!!!!

One more reason why I can't post all that fun stuff

I am... at WORK on SUNDAY!

What the heck is wrong with that woman you ask????
Last week is the matter:
Monday and Tuesday- Every spare minute and some not so spare minutes
spent cleaning and generally preparing/shopping for big first birthday
party.
Wednesday- left work early to finish preparation... Birthday party at
5:30 (which by the way, guests (who do not work for a living) did not bother to show until around 6... more on that rant later perhaps!)
Thursday- received page in middle of important meeting, Grant was
running 103.4 temp! leave meeting.. rush to dr... only to have them
say that it's "nothing" and to wait it out. Arrange for my mom to
come out and spend day with Grant on Friday because he can't go back
to daycare and I have to teach an important lesson on Friday!
Friday- get interrupted while teaching important lesson to have
building nurse tell me that hubby is in nurses office in such severe
stomach cramps that he can't walk... do I want to drive him to the
hospital or should they call the ambulance? (Have I mentioned before
that Adam and I work in the same building?) Spend rest of Friday in ER
with A getting IV fluids and medicine only to have dr say... it's
"nothing" probably just stomach flu. (see also vomiting and diarrhea!)
Saturday- A is actually fine, Grant is improving quickly, I sleep- A
LOT, but we have to cancel big night out plans! We actually were
planning on going to a friends wedding... babysitter and hotel room
cancelled.

I can't wait to see what this week will hold!

When it rains, it pours

More things I will blog about when I have the time:

Grant’s birthday party
The stress of prepping for Grant’s birthday party
Pictures of said party
Memories of Grant’s first year
Funny things Brianna says now that sound grown up
Pictures, of course
Why my husband can be a real donkey sometimes
Why I put up with said donkey
Why work stinks
Why I should never try and be innovative
Why I am proud of being a good, working, mom

Horrible World

This makes me sick!

How could a mother....
UGH!

Crazy Busy and just tired!

No time to post... no energy to think... up coming posts may include:

Brianna and her fear of just about everything!

Grant and his ability to climb stairs faster than me!

The BIG BIRTHDAY!

Photos and more photos!

The worlds most delicious cupcakes which I, myself, baked and thus completely ruined my Weight Watchers week!

Work and how I think I am awesome at it!

Any other suggestions?

And today's another "normal" day

When you have children, every emotion is magnified. The Joys are so much better. The sadness can be so much worse. But mostly, the fears.... they come more often and usually hit me like a freight train.

Last night, I feared for my life a little. I feared for my husbands life a little. I feared for my children's lives so much my body physically ached.

We spent a lovely evening in Chicago having my favorite meal, cooked by my mom, in honor of my dad's birthday. In the distance we could see dark clouds rolling in and lightening flashing. After the presents and pie, we packed up the kids, in their 'jammies, and headed home. We expected to hit rain. Adam was driving because I'm not good at night, my eyes start to hurt and I get REALLY sleepy. One thing about Chicago though, if you don't live there, is that the tall buildings deceive you on distances. The storm that looked miles away was really just outside the downtown area.

As soon as we hit the highway, the rain starting coming down in sheets. Sheets! Waterfalls! A Deluge! Long story short... our drive home was done entirely in various stages of invisibility. At good times, we could see 50-100 feet in front of the car and we drove about 40 mph. At the worst times we drove less than 10 mph and couldn't see our own headlights through the rain and marble sized hail. We thought about pulling over but two things stopped us.

In the back seat were two little heads, both slumped to the left, pudgy faces sleeping like angels. All we wanted was to get those two little people safely home, into their own beds. I turned around to check on them every time a semi-truck barreled past us. I checked on them after every minor accident we drove past. I spent a long time looking at them after the multiple car pile-up we drove by.

I used to worry about myself if my husband passed. I used to worry about him if something happened to me. Yesterday I worried about our will and our finances and what situation am I leaving my children in.

Am I over-reacting? Yeah, maybe a little. But I'm a mom, I get to over-react anytime I want to if my children are at stake. I guess that over-reacting gets bigger/better/worse too!

Birthdays

I started to write a post all about the drama and stress I felt in trying to plan Grant's first birthday party. But the problem is, it turns out it wasn't that dramatic, and now the stress is gone.

Long story short: October weekends are SO packed for my family, we just couldn't find a date when the family could all get together to celebrate. Or at least not one that was remotely close to his actual birthday. So. We are having it on a weeknight. And I feel bad that some family is inconvenienced to come after work, or leave work early, but I feel I had no choice.

In other news; Today Amalah made me cry. I only wish I could say the same things about my life, about my kids, about my husband... because I feel all the same things, I just can't write like that! WOW!

Halloween has been decided!

Halloween... the 2nd most important decision of my month, has been settled.

Luckily, I did not get the Dora dress I was bidding on. Sorry kids, Mommy was not willing to spend over $30 PLUS shipping to get ONE costume! It would have been at least another $30 for the other one.

Really though, it was a good thing. I went home Monday debating on paying too much for the princess Dora costume, or settling on the regular Dora costume. So I asked Brianna which one she wanted... to which she promptly answered... "I don't wanna be Dora anymore, I wanna be a princess! I wanna be Cinereya!" (That's Cinderella for all you people who don't speak three year old.)

SOOOOOOOOO, That actually made Brianna's costume really easy because we already have a Cinderella play dress. The only debate was what should Grant be....
Not Prince Charming, he's way to short!
Not a stepsister because, duh, he's a boy.
Maybe the dog... or the horse...
NO! WHAT WAS I THINKING... OF COURSE HE'LL BE A...... MOUSE!

Tuesday I won a very cute, and very reasonably priced mouse costume on e-bay. I will add a little t-shirt and some booties, and Voila! Cinderella's best friend, the mouse!

It's a little scary how thrilled I am!

Soon to come... the drama of planning Grant's first birthday party....

Stuff...

Halloween... I think we have decided on Dora and Boots. Brianna is almost out of this Dora phase and if we don't do it this year, it's never going to happen. Besides, I think I found the right costumes on E-bay and will be purchasing today to make sure I get them in plenty of time.

New Stuff... Did I mention that Grant can clap now? And that he loves music? Well, yesterday we were at my in-laws with all the 30 year old toys... I started playing on one of those little xylophone things and he stopped dead in his tracks, stared at me while I was playing, and then clapped for me when I was done. It was SO cute!
... Also... We have officially taken Grant off the bottle and put him on sippy cups cold turkey! I was so tired of washing the 4 cracking, leaky, bottles we own daily, I found a sippy he likes and today will buy a boat load of them... or atleast 12! (Why did we only own four crappy bottles... see January and February posts about discontinued bottles!)

Bad Mommy... Grant's dinner was all thrown off by a crazy schedule yesterday (he napped through lunch and didn't eat until 2:30!). It was made worse by dinner at the in-laws (7 adults and 4 kids in a room about 400 square feet). So, I did his dinner out of order; snacks, then veggies... then I should have done the bottle later. PEOPLE... I FORGOT TO GIVE HIM HIS BOTTLE! He didn't even mention it... until 2 am. Then he mentioned it, he mentioned it over and over for a half an hour until obtuse mommy figured out the problem! UGH, Sorry Grant!

And Bri- is fine. No real news. She's a stinker but I love her.

Halloween 04 and 05

Halloween Help Needed

Halloween is coming! Mothers everywhere are either working diligently to make their child the best costume ever, or scouring the stores to buy the one costume that will make their child have the perfect Halloween.

My mother made me Halloween costumes every year that I would let her. Some of my favorite costumes are still hanging in my closets in the hope that some year, they will fit my children just right. My mom spent hours and hours, late at night usually, sewing instead of sleeping.

2003-For Brianna's first Halloween, I made her a Tinkerbell costume. OK, honestly, it was just a green sleeper but I made a little tutu and wings.
2004-For her second Halloween, I made her a strawberry costume. Well, really, it was a red turtleneck and sweatpants but I hand sewed little black beads all over the shirt and made a collar out of felt that looked like leaves.
2005-Last Halloween, Brianna was a cowgirl. I bought a little denim dress and added fringe and bandana print detailing. That year was also Grant's first Halloween. He was a cow! I took a white sleeper and attached black felt spots.
2006-I don't know what to do! I love the idea of my kids having coordinated costumes, I think it's very cute and they are too young to protest. I think I will have to give up on making my kids costumes this year which makes me really sad. I just don't have the time and my skills are sorely lacking. My friend is having the same problem... Any ideas for us? Please help me decide:

Brianna- Princess; Grant- Frog... (not quite right because I really don't want the princess to kiss the frog).

Brianna- Dora the Explorer; Grant- Boots the Monkey... The Dora costume would be pretty easy but the monkey, not so much.

Any other ideas?

Photos, finally, I hope

Too Little, Too Late

Grant can clap his hands! People, this is amazing!

Suddenly on Sunday he just started trying this, and on Tuesday he actually made noise. He was SO excited he kept doing it over and over again. I, ran for the camera!

Of course by the time I put the batteries in (they were charging), and put the memory card it (I'd taken it out to do some downloads), HE STOPPED.

I tried in vain to get him to do it again for the next 20 minutes! No dice. Maybe next weekend...

Trying to post pictures for the third day in a row!

This is what I get instead of pictures... not nearly as enjoyable!

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No time to write, will post newish pics instead

Can't even post pics as blogger is being snotty!

Will try again later.

Confirmation denied

Grant has not really been calling me mama like I thought. I am saddened to think that it may have been a coincidence that he was babbling that sound combination at that time.

He can however wave to me! This is new and exciting and just shut up if you don't think so!

Worst mother in the world; part 35976

Today I sent Grant to school sick.

More specifically:
Grant woke up around two and had a fever. I did not actually take his temperature but people, a mom knows, he was hot, and not in the Paris Hilton way. I gave him Tylenol and we cuddled until I could feel that it was working. I tried putting him to sleep. For the next hour, we played the comfort the baby game. I comfort him for a few minutes and put him down. He sleeps for a few minutes, teasing mommy into thinking it worked, and then he screams until I come back again. Finally at around 3:30, I took him into bed with me. From there, we both slept in 30-45 minute stretches until whatever was wrong started bothering him again.

This morning, the fever was back, he was one hot little guy! However... I can't take off work today because I'm taking off (sort of) for a conference tomorrow and I can't stay on schedule if my students have 2 days of substitute instead of one... SO, I gave my little sicky more tylenol and hope that the 5-6 hours it buys me until daycare figures out that he's sick and shouldn't be there is enough.

That being said... what the heck am I doing writing on my blog when I should be working?

Momentous Occasion

Grant's first word is Mama!

He has been babbling mama, dada, gaga, etc for quite some time now and I didn't think they really had any meaning to him. I still took every opportunity to point to myself and say mama, or call myself mama when talking to him. Still, it sounded like babble when he said it.

Well this weekend, he specifically used Mama to refer to me. How can I be so sure all of a sudden?

WELL, when I left the room to use the restroom, he crawled after me and proceeded to sit outside the door crying and saying "Mama" over and over until I came out! Not my favorite way of finding out, but still momentous!

Ways I would have preferred to hear his first word, for the first time...
- When I pick him up from his crib in the morning.
- picking him up from daycare, with a big smile!
- anytime other than in the JOHN!

Summer Lovin'... Happened so fast!

I always think that I will have so much time to post/e-mail/surf over the summer. I mean, what could be more relaxing than sitting down at a computer, reliving a funny little moment with the kids?

Summer is not relaxing! I don't have time to sit and type. I don't get time alone with quiet! I just don't know how stay-at-home moms do it. I stink at being a stay-at-home mom, even temporarily.

I need work. I crave work. I need the computer with the high speed connection and the kids who are old enough to work silently when I tell them to and don't come running up to me telling me they have buggers or poops!

So now it is school time already. Summer has passed, and while I am sad, I am also very glad! I get more peace and quiet on a work day then I do in a whole week of staying at home with my precious little rugrats!

Monumental Moments of the Summer of 2006:

June:
- Brianna Turned 3 with a birthday party I hated, and one I loved.
- Johanna worked summer school, and after 2 days, swore that she should have been committed for volunteering for such insanity!

July:
- Johanna grudgingly went to summer school each day and cashed/spent her paychecks quickly.
- Adam was a stay-at-home dad who was FABULOUS! He cleaned, they played, the TV was off! What more can you ask for!
- Both kids grew almost as fast as the weeds in our front bushes!

August:
- Adam had shingles. (I have pics but I don't think you really want to see!)
- Trip to Kalahari Resort was postponed once (see above), but eventually happened. Fun, but not real relaxing, and VERY expensive
- Grant started crawling, and soon began winning races with Mom to see who could get to the too-small-for-the-mouth-toys first!
- Brianna began having nightmares about Chuck-E-Cheese several times a week.
- We had a deck built on our house.

All-in-all, a nice summer.

Baby Jail is ready for inmates!

So, we bought the new gate. That's $60 I will never be able to use on shoes or pedicures!

It is 36 inches tall and has only vertical bars, nothing horizontal except at the top and bottom. Now, since this is 3 inches taller than my precious little monkey, and has no center cross bar (which all good children know is the secret to climbing things!), we are relatively confident that she can't climb over this one.

We even tested it with the stool she uses to climb in and out of bed... still way tall!

This is a good thing, naps will now of course return because I have safely locked my child into her room! Right??????

In MY dreams!

Nap, where fore art thou?

Have I mentioned lately that my new 3 year old won't nap?

W.O.N.T. N.A.P.!!!!!!

We have achieved 3 naps in the last 7 days... 2 of which were car produced. Moms- you know... Where you drive around in the car until the little one falls asleep.

Yesterday, we achieved a new low. (or high as the case may be). Brianna, who we always gate into her room so she can't wander aimlessly, figured out how to climb over her gate.

The first time she climbed over the gate, I was freaked out because I heard the floor creaking upstairs and knew that no one should be walking around up there.

The second time (10 minutes after time #1), she fell and hurt herself. At this point screaming commenced which woke up Grant and prompted a long car ride to no where. Brianna fell back asleep in the car but her beautiful little brother, who had been napping wonderfully at home, would not go back to sleep apparently thinking that a 30 minute nap would suffice for the afternoon.

The third time (at bedtime), she scared the piss out of my husband who didn't expect to encounter her wandering the hallway at 10:00 at night.

Today, we are driving the 30 minutes to Vernon Hills Mall, where Babies-R-Us is king, and buying a new, very tall, gate. Wish us luck in foiling the monkey!

Time Out is not a revolving door

In our house we use time out. We put Brianna in the dining room where there is nothing interesting, and you can't see the TV or the parents. We really only use this when she's not listening... We give her a couple of warnings and if she still doesn't listen to our very reasonable requests, she goes in time out. Sometimes she goes there without warnings if it's something we already know she is clear on, like no poking your brother in the eye, or no throwing things in the house.

Lately we have been putting her in time out more for the listening things...

Mom- Brianna, no jumping on the couch.
Bri- I'm gonna jump...
Mom- Brianna, I said no jumping, you could fall and get an ouchie.
Bri- (knees bent, huge grin) I'm gonna jump...
Mom- Brianna, if you jump on the couch I'm going to put you in time out.
Bri- **(Jumps vigorously) I WANT TO JUMP!
(Mom picks up crying child by the armpits and carries her without cuddling to time out spot)
Mom- You need to sit here for 3 minutes until you're ready to listen.
(1 minute crying)
(1 minute silence, sometime punctuated by sniffling)
Bri- (1 minute whining) I want to listen!
(Mom then explains one more time what went wrong and Bri says sorry, life goes on)


Yesterday, Brianna put herself in time out 3 times. People, this is weird. Rather than actually doing the "naughty" thing she wants to do, as soon as I threaten time out, the conversation changes (** point above). Bri grumpily says things like, "I want time out!" So I say fine and she takes herself to time out. Her version of time out is only about 30 seconds long, but she comes back and apologizes, and never actually does what I'm asking her not to do.

I'm not sure how long this will last. I'm totally sure that Jo Frost would not approve. I kind of like it though. She doesn't misbehave as much and I don't have to listen to her scream... I think I'll ride this train as far as I can!

I just don't know what to call this insane ramble.

I am a teacher.

My husband is a teacher.

For better or worse, this means we are both home all summer with our kids. If you are not a teacher, or a parent, perhaps it is easy to see all the pluses of this arrangement. Believe me, it also has it's down sides.

Despite the fact that there is always 75 million things to do, we have a little arrangement so we each get some alone time. In the afternoons, both of the kids take naps... naps which overlap by about an hour or hour and a half on a good day. This is alone time. I spend mine reading or watching tv movies I recorded that he wouldn't watch if the world collapsed and it was all that was available. He works outside, or goes to the driving range or something. I don't even care most days if he's gone longer than the "nap window" as long as I get my time.

Today I did not get my time. Brianna, is suddenly not napping. (Is this a magical thing that as soon as they hit birthday #3 naps disappear like Houdini?) We still make her "rest" in her room though. Sometimes she ends up falling asleep, most often she reads to her baby doll or looks at picture books. Today my darling daughter spent the better part of an hour and a half, alternately screaming to come downstairs and trashing her room. I almost didn't mind the trashing her room because at least it was quiet. I tried to read downstairs but just couldn't concentrate or relax because I was listening to the upstairs and trying to make sure nothing or no one was being permanently harmed.

I finally went upstairs to get her to find that;
1. She had pulled every single wipe out of her diaper wipes and piled them on her bed.
2. She had emptied several of her drawers and pulled out the sticky drawer liner which she crumpled up.
3. She had found a couple of those "Do Not Eat" packets that come with shoes and opened them, spewing little white/clear crystals all over the carpet in her room.
4. She had jumped on her bed, presumably before covering it with wet wipes, and the sheet had pulled off the corners.
5. She was naked except for a diaper... a different diaper than she had on when we put her in her room.

I silently stormed around her room cleaning up the mess while she sort of cowered on her bed asking me what was wrong. I then quietly explained why what she had done was wrong and that I was not happy with her behavior. I then silently got her dressed to take outside to my husband so he could be tortured by her.

HE WAS NOT OUTSIDE. His car was there, He was gone. I still don't know where. I literally sat in the front window watching for him for the next 20 minutes. When he walked into view, I took her outside and told her to walk to daddy. I pointed to him, I pointed to her, and I walked back inside without saying a word. As I walked away he yelled after me, "What?" I didn't dignify that with an answer.

I walked back inside to try and salvage a few minutes of peace and quiet. I had barely sat down to try and decompress, and figure out why I just wasn't handling this well today, when Grant woke up. At that point, I sat on the couch and cried for a few minutes before I got up the energy to go get him. As I type, he is sitting in my lap trying desperately to get the keyboard.

I figured out the following:
1. I need more sleep now that Grant has stopped sleeping through the night.
2. Working summer school sucks.
3. Feeling deserted by my husband sucks.
4. Kids who don't nap.... should nap.

I think maybe tonight I will go see a movie by myself, Or just go to Denny's and drink free refills and read until I feel revived.

pics

New pictures of my kids are posted on Jamie's site under Wednesday, June 21.

As always... Jamie is more on top of things than I am!

Summer is here!

SUMMER IS HERE!!!!!!

The good things:
1. More time with my kids.
2. Less time at work (In a moment of December insanity, I committed to teach summer school 2 hours a day).
3. Time to read, get jobs around the house done, watch tv I've been recording for months.

The bad things:
1. Getting annoyed by my kids.
2. My time at work is the only time I seem to find a moment to check the internet.
ie- less e-mail's read, less blogs written, no pictures posted
3. Yeah right, I have been home for 2 weeks and have maybe read 4 chapters of the book I started in March. TV- watched at least a million (each) of Dora, Calliou, and other various PBS kids programs. Have still not watched movies I recorded in April!


Why is it that my "free time" is busier and more stressful than work?

Bone tired

Did you ever hear someone say that they were "Bone Tired". I'm not sure I knew what it meant but I think I feel it.

After a year in which I worked 3 jobs (Mom, Teacher, Grad Student) I just can't wait for it to end. I have 5 more days of work and they stretch out like an endless country road. The end seems invisible and the scenery is nothing but miles and miles of the same corn I've already seen for 100 miles!

I don't even have the energy to waste time by updating this blog meaningfully. I can only write crap that no one cares about. And click... I can click on a million blogs/sites a day. But I can't post because that requires multiple fingers and brain cells.

Maybe tomorrow will be better. I doubt it though because I'm home alone with the kiddo's tonight... which means either hours and hours of cartoons during which I berate myself for being a lazy parent.... or hours of stressful monitoring and balancing.

Hell, what's one more night of TV... I'll do better this summer Bri, I promise.

50 little things about me

Taken from the lovely and talented Whoorl, and Via my sister

1. What curse word do you use the most? Shit!

2. Do you own an iPod? No but I would like one.

3. Who on your MySpace “Top 8” do you talk to the most? I loathe My Space, it is playground opediphileses.

4. What time is your alarm clock set for? 4:15 am. But I snooze until a little after 5:00.

5. What color is your room? Mossy Green, which I totally regret.

6. Flip-flops or sneakers? Flip Flops, itheirer cute and not trashy.

7. Would you rather take the picture or be in the picture? Take it.

8. What's the last movie you watched? (If you discount my daughter's movies) The Princess Bride, a personal favorite.

9. Do any of your friends have children? Not as many as I'd like.

10. Has anyone ever called you lazy? Yes antheirer usually right.

11. Do you ever take medication to help you fall asleep faster? No

12. What CD is currently in your CD player? Dixie Chicks, I just bought it Friday.

13. Do you prefer regular or chocolate milk? I only drink chocolate.

14. Has anyone told you a secret this week? No.

15. Have you ever given someone a hickey? No.

16. Who was the last person to call you? My mom.

17. Do you think people talk about you behind your back? I'm positive they do.

18. Did you watch cartoons as a child? Yes

19. How many siblings do you have? 1 younger sister

20. Are you shy around the opposite sex? Yes - unless I find them physically/emotionally uninteresting.

21. What movie do you know every line to? The Princess Bride, Cinderella, Pretty in Pink.

22. Do you own any band t-shirts? Yes, but they are country singers from the early 90's... pretty lame!

23. What is your favorite salad dressing? I don't use salad dressing.

24. Do you read for fun? Yes, as much as I can.

25. Do you cry a lot? Yes.

26. Who was the last person to text message you? I don't text message!

27. Do you have a desktop computer or a laptop? Desktop

28. Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoo? No Tattoos, but I would consider a belly button ring if I lost all the weight.

29. What is the weather like? Humid, hot, and sunny.

30. Would you ever date someone covered in tattoos? With a couple tattoos, probably. Covered it them..Probablyly not.

31. Is sex before marriage wrong? Not wrong, but definitely something to think twice about. Once you go there with someone, you can never, ever go back. (Thanks for the perfect words Jamie!)

32. When was the last time you slept on the floor? Last fall when Brianna was sick.

33. How many hours of sleep do you need to function? I have learned to go on about 4, I much prefer 6 or more.

34. Are you in love or lust? Yes.

35. Are your days full and fast-paced? Part of my day is always full and/or fast paced. I have two children.

36. Do you pay attention to calories on the back of packages? Not lately but I really should.

37. How old will you be turning on your next birthday? 30

38. Are you picky about spelling and grammar? Not like you'd expect from a teacher, but still more than some people.

39. Have you ever been to Six Flags? Yes'm. Six Flags Great America in scenic Gurnee, IL.

40. Do you get along better with the same or opposite sex? Same.

41. Do you like cottage cheese? NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!

42. Do you sleep on your side, tummy, or back? Stomach, until my back hurts then I sleep on my side, usually my left side.

43. Have you ever bid for something on eBay? Yes, and thank the LORD I got it!

44. Do you enjoy giving hugs? Depends on the person doling them out.

45. What song did you last sing out loud? "I'm Not Ready to Back Down" by the Dixie Chicks.

46. What is your favorite TV show? CSI, but I'm sort oaddicteded to Deal or No Deal

47. Which celebrity, dead or alive, would you want to have lunch with? I totally agree with Jamie, I want Reese Witherspoon to be my new best friend! I think we would have SO much to talk about.

48. Last time you had butterflies in your stomach? Everytime my kids do something cool and new.

49. What one thing do you wish you had? Enough money to stay home, and a job flexible enough that I could work part time... but Jamie's answer of "A soda fountain of Diet Coke in my apartment." works for me too.

50. Favorite lyrics? Lately- SaraBeth by Rascal Flatts

THANK YOU!

Big Thanks to my sister for adding some of my favorite blogs to my sidebar! I know less than nothing about how this stuff works. I can point and click but draw the line at figuring out the coded language of creating websites!

A student no more

Yesterday I presented my graduate research for my masters degree. I choose to investigate why teachers choose to join committees, or not join committees. I was very impressed that 7 of my friends from class came to see my presentation. More importantly, BOTH of my building principals came, and actually listened, and seemed interested in what I had to say. My graduate professor who was monitoring me for the past 2 years also seemed impressed. He even asked my permission to tell future graduate students about my research so they could piggy-back off of it and extend it. I was flattered, and thrilled, and of course said yes.

Today, I took the word student from my sidebar. Student is not a word I will use to describe myself anymore... well at least not until my kids are older, and my husband can hear the word doctorate without attempting to strangle me.

Pre-occupied

I have so many things I could post today, for a change. Brianna saw Dora Live last night... Grant learned to pull himself to sitting... We had a fabulous weekend... but I can't post any of that today because I am hell-a-distracted!

Today at 3:00 central standard time, I will present 2 years worth of graduate research. This is the LAST thing I need to do to complete my Masters Degree. Tomorrow morning, I plan on taking the word "student" out of my sidebar comments, and I will have a mini-me-party while doing it.

I can't get a darn thing done today. I am SOOOOOOO focused on 3:00. Did I mention my presentation is at 3:00. At 3:00 I will begin telling my school principals that they have tons of bad feeling circling around and will tell my grad professor that I ran a crappy research study.

Pray for 3:45.... I need 3:45....

I have nothing good to say...

So I'll post pictures!!!!

Like Grant giving us a GREAT BIG SMILE,
Brianna recieving her special Doctor kit after giving up Binky,
And GG (Great Grandma) hugging both kids on Mothers Day.

I'm counting my chickens

Last night was SOOOOOO much better. Brianna still asked for the binky but only whined for about 20 minutes! We've had worse nights than that with the binky.

Brianna LOVED her doctor kit. We played doctor all evening. We even had to take the stethoscope with us to dinner! She is crazy about it, she was the doctor and the patient at one point. Her baby doll got more shots than a heroin addict.

I'm so glad we didn't give in!
Do it people!!!
BAN THE BINKY!

My First Ponytail!

What Supernanny doesn't show you

We have been gearing up for some time to try the "Binky Fairy" technique as seen on ABC's Supernanny! Now, as a somewhat capable parent, I love to watch Jo Frost deal with the crazy people they dig up for that show! I do occasionally see a technique I like. This "Binky Fairy" technique involves gathering all the pacifiers in the house and putting them outside in a bag for the binky fairy to come and take to little kids that need them. In return the binky fairy leaves a special present for the newly binky free child. Sounded pretty good to me.

Last night, we took our one remaining binky and put it in a large gift bag and set it out on the front porch. We left a little note asking the binky fairy to take it and leave a special toy (and a sucker, Brianna wanted a sucker). Tonight, we will check the bag and the Binky Fairy will have left a very special doctor kit with a real working stethoscope and a blood pressure cuff! And a sucker!

This all sounds well and good... and we thought a nice thing to try.... but here is what Supernanny doesn't tell you...

She doesn't warn you that your precious daughter will cry for over an hour and a half because she is used to going to sleep with the binky. She doesn't warn you that your heart will break and your only thoughts will be of giving her back the binky because it's a school night and you all have to get up in a little over 6 hours.

I was only saved from the hazards of giving in by one simple fact... the same fact that made us finally choose Sunday May 14, 2006 as the Binky Fairy date... the one and only remaining binky had fallen in an un-flushed toilet that day. The ONLY, I repeat O.N.L.Y. thing stopping me from giving in last night was the thought of my precious daughter sucking on something that had recently been in her own pee. No amount of boiling and sterilizing could have made me do that!

Perhaps tonight will be a better night because now that I've jumped off the cliff, I'm going all the way to the bottom.

The Decline of our Society

When we were kids, my sister and I would see who could hit the other on target with the straw wrapper when we went out to eat. Sometimes my dad would join in and my mom would just shake her head at us. More fun was had aiming for heads and noses and glasses of coke during the first five minutes of the meal than for the rest of the evening.

Recently I tried to teach Brianna how to blow the straw wrapper off. I wanted to corrupt her just a little rather than letting Jamie have all the fun. (More about the ways Jamie has corrupted Bri on another day!)

Straw wrappers these days just aren't the same. You can't just blow one end and expect it to fly with ease toward your target of your husband's forehead! You have to pull it slightly off, or even halfway off, and line up carefully because the weight is uneven and it will fly slightly to the left or right depending on which side the seam is on. By then, who cares because your husband knows it's coming and he is giving you that look that says "What are you DOING?" and "Are you really going to teach her that?". And it's just not fun anymore!

My only graduation photos

This past weekend, I graduated with my Masters in Educational Leadership. This means that in a few years, when I'm feeling crazy again, I can become a principal! I was very pleased to have my family there to watch me. My parents, sister, aunt/godmother, husband and children all came to watch. There were a number of camera's there to record it for posterity. I brought our camera, but my dear husband, who was there under some degree of protest, did not take any pictures.

What follows is the only pictures I have from graduation day... Brianna after graduation.

Still sleeping....

Bed time

Adam takes Brianna and puts her to bed most nights. This started because when I was nursing, Grant always seemed to want eat at exactly her bedtime. It has sort of continued because it works for us. They have worked out a little routine with how many books to read and what little rituals need to be done. He likes to talk to her about her day and what will happen tomorrow.

Some night, I take Bri to bed. We have a slightly different ritual. I like to tell her all the ways I love her and say prayers.

Last night as Adam was trying to get her up to bed, she started crying for me. This, in itself, is not unusual. But, last night she had already had her hugs and kisses from me and we'd said good night. She wanted her prayers. She climbed back up in my lap, cuddled into my neck and I said the prayers. She is trying to memorize them so every now and then I pause and let her insert the next word. At the end we say Amen together and give a big hug. I love that she loves it!

Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray the lord my soul to sleep.
Angels watch me through the night,
wake me with the morning light.
God Bless mommy and daddy,
Brianna and Grant,
Grandma and Grandpa's,
Aunts and Uncles and Cousins,
God Bless Everyone,
Amen.

"Funny Noises"

It was pointed out to me this weekend by my loving sister Jamie, that I have a tendency to blow my nose rather loudly. I have had a cold or some spring allergies or something recently and so find myself blowing my nose quite often.

This morning, I blew my nose while waiting at a stop light. Brianna began laughing her head off! She said to me, "Mommy, I want to make funny noises". I pretended to not know what she was talking about, this is not by any stretch of the imagination the first time she has heard me blow my nose... I knew I was sunk though when she asked for a tissue and began blowing loudly through her mouth. Then it was my turn to laugh hysterically. What a great kid!

PS- I tried to turn this into a lesson on how to blow your nose, but no dice, still to young I guess.
Always a teacher...

Happy Mothers Day to ME!

Yesterday we had the nicest little mothers day party at Brianna's "school". Yes, I know MD is 11 days away but for a variety of reasons, yesterday was a good day for it. The kids put on a little show for us where they danced along to little songs. (I call these hokey pokey songs... They words tell you what to do and you just listen and follow along). Then we ate a lovely snack of cheese nips and danishes accompanied by our choice of apple juice, ice tea, or water.

The culmination of the big party was when each child presented their mother with a gift they had made. (Brianna thought the gift was FOR her, not FROM her!) It was a lovely (cardboard) jewelry box on which someone claiming to be Brianna had hot-glued little gems. (Please GOD tell me that they didn't let my 2 year old anywhere near a hot glue gun!) Inside the jewelry box was a scarf (dollar-store bandana) as a gift from the teachers. Mine was white with blue polka-dots. Bri's teachers said to me... "I thought you'd like it, you wear a lot of blue".

People... If you discount blue jeans....I OWN NOTHING BLUE!

On the serious plus side, There was a very nice card with a poem the teachers had written and a drawing by the real Brianna. There was coupons for extra hugs and kisses from Brianna. And there was a nice lily (That will probably die in my car today because I forgot to take it out).

I love the thought, and they say that's what really counts.

Could someone please tell me which pile my brain is under?

I really shouldn't be posting this!

I really don't have time to waste posting and reading blogs. I should be working. The piles of work to be done are near to breaking my desk. And the "TO DO" lists are starting to cc: other "TO DO" lists about how little is actually getting done.

I have been up until 11 or 12 every night this week. (Shut up, don't tell me it's only Wednesday and that it shouldn't count as a week yet.) And the littlest love of my life has been wide awake and ready to go around 5 every morning. This is one very precious half hour earlier than I want to get up.

I have new pictures.... no time to download... maybe by Friday.
I have funny stories.... no time to remember details, oh well.

Kids, I'm sorry Mommy is a raving lunatic who doesn't remember what you were like as babies and didn't keep up with your baby books. I still love you!

Just because

Photos for fun!

Speak into my good ear!

Brianna is getting much more verbal. She constantly amazes us with the thoughts she can express, often in a pretty good imitation of a complete sentence. She especially likes to talk on car rides...

She tells us her feelings, talks about school yesterday (or weeks ago), narrates what she's seeing outside, tells us what Grant is doing, etc. Sometimes she talks loudly and clearly and I can even have a conversation with her. This morning we talked about how birds have wings and they fly up in the sky and how Brianna and Mommy and Daddy and Grant have hands not wings and that we can't fly up in the sky.

Sometimes Bri seems to be talking to no one. I'm not sure if this is the beginning of an imaginary friend or if she just thinks better out loud. Our only problem is when she is talking in her low, sort of to herself mode, and then expects a response! From the front of the car what I heard was, "Sheila huystsoighakndoidfs friends sfoifsdfkmdlfkio no like oaidflanmlkfnoi banana dlskfjoasdifjalsdkf John. Right Mommy?"

And I brightly say, "That's right honey!"
It must be! Brianna said so!

pictures

Once again, my sister is better about posting pictures of my kids than I am! Oh well!

Go to her site and enjoy!

I forgot the camera

Today I had planned on posting some adorable pictures of my kids in their coordinating Easter outfits... but I forgot the camera! In all the hullabaloo of getting bottles and diapers and such and trying to get out the door somewhat close to on time... It didn't even occur to me!

I am hoping that Jamie will e-mail me some pics, or maybe my mom (but that would be quite a technological feat for her!)

I am planning on getting the kids pictures taken this weekend so I will take a photo then and pretend that I remember to do it on Easter!

Drama Queen

Last night, Brianna got out of bed and came downstairs after she was supposed to be sleeping. I heard her coming down the stairs but Adam was outside and I was feeding Grant so didn't turn to her right away. The moment I turned to see her (standing just low enough to be in sight, about half way down the stairs), her face went from passively watching me to gut wrenching sobs in about one second. During second number two, the waterworks started. By the time she made it to the bottom of the stairs she was hysterically sobbing complete with runny nose.

Because I couldn't stop feeding Grant to take her right back upstairs, we waited for Adam to come in. During that 3 minutes or so, she cuddled next to me on the couch and scaled back to whimpering with random tears. And then she broke my heart...

As Adam came back in I told her it was time to go back to bed and go "night night". The sobbing came back and she paused just long enough to look in my eyes and say, "But I need you mommy."

What do you say to your not quite 3 year old an hour after bedtime when all they claim to want is more time with you?

Me, I send her upstairs with her father and shed a few tears of love.

What do you think?

Hello wonderful readership of 3-5 people! What do you think, do my kids look alike?
Brianna at about 3 months old:
Grant at about 3 months old:

I can do pictures!!!!!!

Grant is wearing a funny hat!

And this is Brianna at Chuck-E- Cheese!

Remember back in January when I went to Chucky's house (that's what Bri calls it) and I said I would post pictures!

Oh My God!!! Thank you Blogger


I'll post better pictures soon, that's all I had handy!

Cute things

I was trying to find a particular story to post today and can't really think of just one thing. There are so many cute things that Brianna does on a daily basis that I haven't really talked about yet. (Grant still doesn't do much, although his laugh is really cute.)

- When Bri hears an interesting noise she puts her hand up to her cheek and says "I hear somtin."

-When you give Bri 2 options that she doesn't like (Do you want to put your PJ's on or sleep in your clothes?) she says "Nothin". As if by denying both choices, she will be allowed to do whatever she wants.

- She LOVES school busses and trains. Everyday on our way to and from school we have to watch for them.

- She sings along with her favorite songs. She substitutes a nice ah ah ah sound when the words are too fast or hard for her.

- She HATES when Adam and I try and sing to her songs. She gets very mad at us and yells "No Mommy!"

- When we won't let her do what she wants she pouts and stalks off to a corner to sit. She tells us "I'm not happy with you." or "I mad at you."

- She hugs her brother a LOT and when I remind her to be gentle, she looks at me and with a completely grown-up tone tells me "I AM being careful."

- She likes to eat apples the way an adult would, whole, taking the cutest little bites out of the skin.

This morning Adam drove the kids to school and while I liked being on time for a change; I was sad that there was no one to point out the "Choo Choo" to or to sing silly songs for me.

Thou dost protest to much

Today we took the kids to the mall for lunch and a little spring clothes shopping. We also do this on a fairly regular basis to tire the kids out when it's not nice enough outside on a weekend. (People, the mall is huge! We could walk and shop for hours!)

Grant was in total overstimulation mode. If you've never seen a baby overstimulated, think of a dog the first 2 minutes at a dog park. Must see everything, must touch/taste/feel/smell everything. Will freak if not allowed to do everything. SO he started freaking out after an hour or so, too much to handle at 5 1/2 months old I guess! We weren't even in the car 2 minutes and he was sleeping like a rock.

Brianna on the other hand... Chatty Cathy was narrating the ride home for us. We heard about Grant sleeping, we heard about the red or green lights, we heard about the other cars, we heard about the trees... suddenly we hear the same phrase over and over... "Mommy, I'm not tired". (Which actually sounded more like, Mummy, I not tie-werd.) I said what I always say, "That's OK." She continued to try and convince us for the next minute or two. (Try saying the same four words over and over for a full minute, it's very annoying.) And then... Silence. Eyes closed, commence quiet snoring!

We repeated a version of this when I lifted her out of the car to take her to bed at home. (I lift her up) Mommy, I not tired. (I settle her head on my shoulder.) Mommy, I not tired. (Her voice is fading slowly as I carry her up the stairs.) Mommy, I not...zzzzzzzz.

I'm still here

It's been a while...

We had a lovely spring break, sort of. Grant's teachers thought he was sick so I had to keep him home the Friday before break, a hectic way to leave work but he never did get sick so that was good. I on the other hand developed some freakish cold that was a little different everyday. Monday- 103 degree fever; Tuesday- serious congestion; Wednesday- The sore throat; Friday- the coughing. Only the coughing continued and is just now winding down over a week later!

On the plus side, we bought a new car! We decided that Adam's 2 door cavalier with no air conditioning was just not going to cut it anymore. (Forget the fact that it needed a couple hundred dollars worth of work!) After much debate and a dozen almost decisions, we bought a 2006 Toyota Camry. We got a great deal because they already had some 2007 models on the lot (What the F is up with that?).

In order to accomplish this monumental feat of decision making, we sent Brianna to school 3 of the 5 days. Yes, we were home relaxing and could have been spending quality time with her but sent her to school anyway. Trust me, it was better for all of us. I am dreading summer! She is so bored at home and the kids in the neighborhood just aren't quite the right age for playing. BESIDES the fact that when a 2 1/2 year old is nearby, no one relaxes!

So now all that fun is over. I am back at work counting down the days to summer and debating some serious internal job moves. I'm a little stressed, maybe more later on that...

I have a favorite picture I keep next to my desk... It is a toddler with his/her head resting on the wall with eyes shut. The caption says "Any idiot can face a crisis- it's this day-to-day living that wears you out." (Anton Chekhov)

SO. TRUE.

Different kids

I know that most of the time I post about my children, my kids, Brianna and Grant... But I am also a teacher and I have 99 other kids that I think about daily.

I worry about them and care about how they do and wonder what they think and wish for their success.

I can't motivate all of them if they don't want to be motivated.
I can't make them listen and remember.
I can't bend the directions everytime one needs to succeed a little more.
I can't do it for them or fix it every time.

Most sadly, I can't make their parents support them or support me.

Parents- The best thing you can do for your children is be there when they need you, and try and see both sides of every story. I know your child is wonderful and believable and they never stretch the truth in their favor... But sometimes the teacher has good ideas and reasons behind their behavior. Sometimes your child has to be upset to learn a lesson. Sometimes they might even need to fail because they didn't pay attention in class or remember to do their big project on time. I KNOW IT'S HARD! Life is hard. It's sad but true. You will not be there to call the college professor or your child's boss when their work is late or done improperly.

I would really like to tell you the story that is prompting this but I am too afraid of it being read by the wrong person.

I AM NOT PICKING ON YOUR CHILD.

Obsessions

I don' know if it's just Brianna, or if it's all 2 year olds... They get obsessed with things!

This week it's stop signs. I don't know if road signs are something the daycare is teaching her or what but she is obsessed with stop signs. She points out every stop sign we see, and asks for more stop signs if there aren't any around. Add this to the green light/red light things and driving in a car with her is REALLY annoying.

To add more fuel to my morning fire, the majority of our drive is east, straight into the sun. After repeating several times that the sun is awake, she starts complaining that it is in her eyes. Not that I can blame her there, the sun is indeed blaring right into our eyes. In the past we have given her paper or a folder to hold up to block the sun. On really cranky mornings, we've even had to hold it up for her. Recently though, I bought her little sunglasses. She finally stopped playing with them long enough to wear them properly and now we can't drive anywhere with out them!

Horror of Horrors...today the sunglasses were left in Daddy's car! The entire way to work I had to hear various levels of whining... I need my glasses! Luckily the sun was blocked by clouds occasionally. I think I will have to buy a second set of glasses this week!

Grant- you don't ever have to start talking if you don't want to!!!

Lazy A-- Post

I am too tired and too busy to really post today but Jamie has some great pictures of my kids today.

If it's not one thing...

So. We figured out this whole Grant/Bottle thing and I won my bids on e-bay. As I speak (type?) more bottles and a variety of nipples are on their way to me. This should be enough to last us quite a while, until sippy cup time! In the meantime, my whole family came down with colds this weekend. Boxes and Boxes of tissue later, everyone is well but me. I seem to have progressed from head cold to mind numbing flu. I took today off work and will probably take tomorrow off as well. Friday I 'm taking the 99 hormonal teenagers and 10 responsible (?) parents on a field trip. If I'm not better by then, I might just kill myself by the end of the day. I'll let you know! (PS- Today Blogger won't let me use my return key to move the cursor so please pardon my messy post!)

More Childhood Torture

Today, and for the next 48 hours, all Grant is going to get is formula. Icky, smelly, tastes like ear wax, formula. And why???? Because mommy doesn't love you enough to breastfeed into eternity. Mommy is just plain sick of the pumping and the crap!

So Grant, when you vaguely remember hating me for some reason, this is it. But don't blame it only on me. The Internet at large and a book called "The Baby Whisperer" told me to do it. They told me that if I don't offer you anything else for 48 hours, you will be forced to drink it because you will get hungry enough. GOD I HOPE SO!

Now that we have bottles you like, you can't use that excuse anymore. So drink up kid! This will be the only thing your getting, I don't care how much you scream. (OK, I do care but my long term sanity is on the line here so please shape up already!)

Today I became an E-Bay shopper

Grant has picked a bottle he likes!!!! Yeah!!!!!

It is discontinued!!!!! UGH!!!!!!

Why is my Jewel even selling bottles that have been discontinued for a year? Even the company doesn't have any more to sell me or give me, they don't even advertise them on their website!
Why is my son so difficult? Is this a sign of things to come? I am quite scared.

So today I stalked e-bay! I found some bottles I can get for VERY reasonably, but the nipples are going to astronomically expensive from a different seller. If I "win" both these items, I will have enough bottles to get through one day at a time. I will continue to spend every evening washing bottles so that I can pre-make them for the next day.

I mentioned this to a nosey/friend/fellow mom at school and she now considers herself on a mission to find more of these bottles for me. I appreciate her help but think she is really weird for wanting to spend her weekends looking for bottles for me.

If you want to be a personal shopper too... Keep your eyes open for "Evenflo Elite". It is a clear bottle with a blue ring and a very shallow, wide nipple. (Hello perves!)

Stalling

Right this minute I should be working on a short paper/assignment that I have due in Grad class tonight. I just can't care! 8 more nights to go...

For posterity

If my kids actually read this someday, like I hope, to find out the things I can't remember from their childhood... I think it's time to log what our day looks like:

5:30 Mom wakes up and gets herself ready
6:00 Mom feeds Grant while Dad gets Brianna ready
6:15 (or more like 6:30 most days) Mom leaves for school with Bri and Grant, Dad gets himself ready
6:45? Dad leaves for work
6:45 ish- Mom drops the kids at school- first I drop off Grant, then Brianna with some cuddles, then back to Grant for cuddles and our daily list of new things to try so maybe Grant will eat today!
7-4 Parents working.... Kids playing
Brianna- You love the kitchen area, especially shopping with the plastic shopping cart and taking care of the baby dolls. You also love painting and eating. Your favorite foods are Chicken nuggets and Mac and Cheese. You also will eat pasta, apples, or grapes until you explode! You are still napping about 2 hours every afternoon. When I come to pick you up, you don't want to leave school. You always ask for "tee mo minutes" (Three more minutes). I usually give you about 5 while I hear from your teachers about what a stinker you were today.
Grant- You are napping about 3 times a day, for an hour or 1 1/2 hours at a time. You eat twice a day at school. You are a stinker about eating at school, you give your teachers a really hard time. You have done better these past few days with new bottles and I really hope that you will be a better eater soon. You are so good at "Tummy time" that you haven't learned to roll over yet. I know you will soon though. You have just figured out mirrors and break into the biggest, most beautiful smile whenever you catch site of yourself in one. Your teachers love you silly and cuddle you a lot even though you are cranky for them.
4-6 Mom picks up the kids and we all go home and play or watch tv. (Dad picks up on Wednesday's and Mom goes to grad school)
6ish- Dinner as a family. We go out about twice a week, or bring in food more often. On Tuesday's Dad and Mom take turns taking Brianna to Gymnastics (aka 'nastics). Bri LOVES 'nastics!
8:15/8:30 Dad takes Bri to bed most nights. Mom does it occasionally if she's not feeding Grant at this time. We read you two books, turn out the lights, say prayers, tuck you in, and remind you of all the wonderful things that happened today and might happen tomorrow. We give you one book to "read" as you fall asleep.


Kids- We love you THIS much!

No news is just more of the same

The old saying goes... "No news is good news"... well, not always in my findings.

No news just means everything is the same. Good or bad...just same.

In my case, that's not so good. We are trying new bottle styles with Grant this week and am planning to deprive him of food this weekend. Not really but... Someone I know recommended a book called "The Baby Whisperer". This book recommends the following: Offer your baby nothing but a bottle for 48 hours, offer it every hour until he drinks from it. This is based on the premise that he will eat if he gets hungry enough. I SINCERELY HOPE SO! I'm not sure I can take the screaming if it doesn't work. Anyway, the theory goes that after the 48 hours, as long as you offer a bottle once a day the baby will never have a problem drinking from them. It worked for my friend. I think I might call my pediatrician and see what they think of my intentional torture of my infant son.

Brianna is good. Cranky though. I think she realizes that most of my attention and time is being spent trying to figure out Grant's stuff. She knows she's getting the shaft and is acting out to get attention. She's not doing anything major, but sometime the little annoying things are worse than one big thing. She likes to put toys in her mouth. She knows that's not what she's supposed to do but... she puts them in her mouth and then turns to me and mumbles... "look at me mommy" and grins like the devil! I tell her to take it out and she does for a while, until she feels silly again.

Adam is not doing so good. He doesn't tolerate Grant's temper tantrums well. He gets REALLY frustrated and just needs to get away. When he's stuck, he gets angry. I know he only wants to make our kids happy but he scares me a little when he's angry around the kids. I don't want them to learn that yelling is the way to get things done. He's working on it.

ME, I'm just same... sleep deprived, a little sad, and V.E.R.Y. busy!

Tomorrow I'll try and look for happy things to post.

Bottles and formula

Please let as many moms as you know about today's post... I need as many temporary readers as I can get so I can get lots of advice.........


Quickly about me for those who don't know me:
I have a daughter Brianna who is now 2 1/2. I also have a 4 month old son Grant. He is my concern today...

He refuses formula! I have been nursing thus far but am having a very hard time balancing work and pumping and want him to take formula at school then I will (ideally) nurse at night. When his teachers try and give him bottles he arches his back and turns his head repeatedly. They really have to "fight" with him to get him to eat. I have noticed this same behavior at home when my husband is bottle feeding him... at at this point we are bottle feeding breast milk.

Consequently, he is very unhappy at daycare, and is not gaining weight the way he should. He only gained 1/2 pound in the last month.

On top of his reluctance toward bottles, he seems to hate formula. We have tried 2 types of standard formula, these make him throw up. He seems to have a problem digesting them. He reacts ok to soy formula but hates to take it.

HELP!

Any suggestions for types of bottles that might be better?
Or similar experiences that I could share with my Dr.?

I am currently thinking that I might just have to go to all bottles and all formula! Sudden switch style. I can only imagine that this is the only way he will get hungry enough to eat and get used to the formula. That would make me very sad though...