Friday, September 16, 2005

4 or 5 more weeks

I planned a really good post this morning during my drive to work.

I can't remember what it was... I thought it would come back to me as I stared at the screen.... no such luck.

This is what they call Pregnancy Brain! Anything I don't do IMMEDIATELY must be written on a neon post it note and stapled to my head or hand or something. It's really gone.

I know it had to do with Brianna... and Grant... and I had some really cute quips planned.

Oh well, I guess I'll actually have to grade papers instead.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

I made it

I made it to Target and back but they had no short sleeved maternity tops so I had to buy an ugly, too big, men's t-shirt.

My professional attire looks like crap now!

I am a horrible blogger

I guess this is the reason why I never kept a journal or diary. I do not do well with making time to write daily.

I am thinking of changing the premise of this blog, or scrapping this one and starting a new one. I think I would like to blog about my children (child, soon to be plural). I don't really think that would be more interesting for the web world but I would like my children to be able to read it someday and know what they were like as little people.

Anyone who knows me knows that my long term memory is HORRIBLE. I can't remember details from most of my childhood. I remember general feelings or big events but the little things, the fun things, are lost forever.

It terrifies me that my children will someday ask me about their childhoods and I won't remember.

I am pondering this especially today. Our AC is out at work, which I was not prepared for, so I am sitting here sweating like an aerobics class, except I am wearing a long sleeved blouse and long pants! Grant seems to like it though, he is kicking up a storm. Consequently, I am walking around holding my belly more than usual and people keep asking me if I am ok.

I am actually going to Target during lunch to buy a t-shirt and maybe some lightweight capri's. Do I need more summer weight clothes in Mid- Sept. with only 4-5 weeks left in this pregnancy, HELL NO! but I'm never going to survive the second half of the day if I don't!

Wish me luck getting back on time!

Thursday, August 18, 2005

My Angel

Brianna is my Angel.

I am at work today and was putting off actually doing something by looking at a new picture of her. She is off with her grandma today visiting great-grandma. The best thing about sending her off with my mom is that she goes happily. I am actually anticipating that Bri will cry when grandma leaves this afternoon.

For the good of nothing in particular, here are some funny things Bri says:
(remember she's only 2!)

foo fies = French Fries
oh tah = Oh Kay!
Hi Elmo (well, actually she says hi to all her favorite characters when they show up on tv)
cake cake = pancake, a daily request in our house
kack kack = back pack (Lord love it, she actually carries her own diaper bag now since it's in her favorite back pack!)

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

I'm Back... (cue the scary music)

Well it's been ages! It has been quite a summer and I am moderately excited to get back to work and "normal" life.

This summer we traveled to Alaska for Adam's family reunion. Then after a mere 3 days at home, we drove from Chicago to the southern coast of South Carolina for my family reunion. For you travelers, Seabrook Island was nice, but I wouldn't really recommend it. It only qualified as "fine". Besides all that, there were grad school classes, a moderately successful garage sale, and lots of pregnancy progress.

I am now 31 weeks pregnant. 9ish weeks to go and I wish I had the time to freak out, I would really like to! Baby Grant is growing fine they tell me, I'm maintaining a moderately small bump and actually have only gained 4lbs this pregnancy. Dr's are not worried as I was heavier than ideal to start with. I guess this makes up for my last pregnancy when I gained just shy of 50lbs!

We are back to work out here in the 'burbs. Teacher institutes start Friday and our students have their first day Thurs after that. Why do you care?

I'm back on a reliable, fast computer and will hopefully be blogging MUCH more often.
Be worried... I envision lots of blogging about Brianna's struggles with daycare, her big girl bed, and potty training. Or perhaps you would prefer pregnant woman gripes? I will try and mix it up for you!

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

No more pictures or posts

Well, Pictures of 6 flags, and anything else I wish, will have to wait.

Modem at home is totally fried thanks to a lightening storm last week that sent a powersurge through our phone line. I'm sure we will get around to fixing it as we are adicted to the internet, but not for a while. We will be out of town until mid-August and will have to order repairs after that.

I hope you all have an enjoyable month, and I'll see you not so soon!

Thursday, July 07, 2005

A Great Day in America

Yesterday Adam and I took Bri to Six Flags Great America. It was a BLAST! Yes, I know she is only two and cant ride 95% of the rides. WHO CARES!?! It was a not-too-hot day, sunny but not baking, and we had fun till Bri dropped. Literally.

We ate hot dogs and funnel cakes.
We walked, a LOT.
We rode the kiddy rides.
We tried out the new waterpark;
kiddy area,
wave pool,
lazy river.

As a last stop we hit a shop (it's illegal to leave with out an overpriced souvenir to round out overpriced day). In the 5 min. I needed to find the perfect thing. Bri fell asleep. Sitting up. In her stroller. Drooling. Pictures will follow next week.


Saturday, July 02, 2005

I am not a Bitch

This comment is mostly for Jamie, but is also something I have recently confirmed about myself.

I just finished three of the most hectic weeks ever. So much for summer being a time to relax, HA! I took two full graduate school courses with a combined 9 projects/papers between them. Meanwhile, I was still trying to find time to spend with Brianna and Adam, and heaven forbid, find time to rest so that my pregnant body doesn't self destruct on me! If you've never been pregnant, you'll figure out this comment when you are!

I technically still have one of the nine papers to write, but I have until next Friday so in true procrastinator style, I am waiting until after the fourth to start. I deserve a weekend.

Anyway, back to my original idea for this post... I am not a bitch.
1. Jamie- I warned the few readers of this blog that updating it would be almost non-existent for a while!
2. In my recent class on leadership, I learned that I am not a bitch, I am a leader. What I need to work on I guess is when to lead, and when to step back and let someone else lead. OK, I have a lot of things I need to work on but that is a biggie for me.

My Affirmations:
1. I do not have to be in charge and know everything all the time.
2. I need to take time for myself.
3. I need to learn when to be friends with someone, and when to simply be friendly.

I hope that everyone is well, and having a safe holiday weekend. I'll try and get back sooner rather than later. With pictures!

Thursday, June 09, 2005

Really quick

I just wanted to say that I feel productive today!

This is a pretty unusual occurrence for any day of which I am on summer break, let alone one that is the 4th 90 degree day in a row.

Today I have done a little work, I have shopped, and I have paid bills. Soon I will add laundry and cooking dinner to my growing list. For a summer day, even one of these would count and good, two or more should count as exceptional!

That being said... I have better things to do than hang out on the internet during the last 15 minutes of only free time (nap!).

Monday, June 06, 2005

All the News!

1. School is out! Hooray!!! I would totally go get a really good pitcher of daiquiris if I could!

2. I am now working on slower-than-a-turtle-stuck-in-an-ice-cube computer and will probably be posting less often than before. (as if that is even possible.)

3. It's a boy, or it's going to be a boy, but it already is a boy, it's just not born yet. What is the proper way to say that? I'm pregnant with a little boy who will be named Grant William. I am excited that he will be born after his sister who will hopefully teach him not to be a schmuck as he grows up. He won't learn most of it from his daddy so Brianna and I will have to teach him.

Must go nap now while I have the chance! (GOD, I love being a teacher in the summer.)


Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Anal Retentive Witch

Apparently, the title, is me!

I think I was trained well as a child to be over-conscious about obligations and duty. Thanks Mom!

I am the leader of a 4 person team at work. The students left today at about 1:15. Our contract states we are to be at work until 2:45, the extra time is dubbed "records time" for all the end of year crap we have to do. At 2:40, I am now the only member of my team working or even in the building. This really bothers me.

It doesn't bother me that I am at work, this is my job, this is part of my job description, no hard feelings there. I am VERY bothered by 3 coworkers who decided to take off early because they felt like it, or that they were done with their work, or that they had to run to the bank and the grocery store. Is no one a responsible adult anymore?

And by the way, the 2 that are "done" with their work... knowingly ignored potential problems so that they could be done, and then admitted that they would not go back and re-do the work even though they knew it was incomplete. The third went home early because she has to come back tonight (also in our contract) and wanted longer between drives back and forth.

There is so much more I could say but I am Too. Damn. Mad!

Friday, May 27, 2005

Feeling great!

It is Friday afternoon... My last class of the day is watching a movie.... I'm going home early today to pack for nice(?) weekend in beautiful Galena..... Three day weekend which includes mom and Adam's birthday's and my (our) aniversary.... and next week is my LAST WEEK OF SCHOOL.

Try hard to remember all those years ago to when you were a student approaching the last week of middle or elementary school. (Not high school or college because they had the stress of finals.) Now, take that childhood joy and multiply it by 10, or 100 because that's how teachers feel!

All is good.

Monday, May 23, 2005

Am I stupid or something?

1. I wore white again today and within the first five minutes had spilled orange soda on myself.

2. I got up and got ready in anticipation of a 6:45 meeting this morning only to remember a block from the house that the meeting was tomorrow.

3. So I went home and got Bri, relieving Adam from this painful duty of the unhappy drop off.

4. Which of course made me 20 min late for work.

5. And I spent all my cash at the dollar store yesterday so must eat microwave popcorn for lunch. Or Bum $ from friends which does not sound good.

Sunday, May 22, 2005

Top 5 reasons why Moms should not wear white!

5. White is a magnet for food spills and messes.
4. Children will see you as a target for chicken McNuggets drenched in Ketchup.
3. Popsicles will drip on you.
2. Diaper messes... Need I say more?
1. You are a human Kleenex/napkin for every grubby hand and nose within a mile!

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

I'm the Susan

Go to and scroll down to the Desperate Housewives ad. Click on it and search for the link to find out what Desperate Housewife you are! Make sure you let me know.... I'm Susan, I'm very nosey and want to know your business! This is so true!

Because I have nothing else to say

Please take one minute everyday to help women in need.

The Breast Cancer Site has a little button you can press once a day to help fund mamograms for women who can't afford them for themselves. If you have more than one minute, the site has some wonderful sponsors who help support breast cancer research funding.

Bookmark the site and go there everyday!

Monday, May 16, 2005

naked at work

If you are here because of the title... go away Perv!

Our e-mail system is down today and I feel totally isolated! I work in a huge school, more than 200 staff members, most days our school is more like a small company than what most of you remember from your school days. We really rely on our e-mail system to pass messages, get information and just to be connected. Without that in place, I might as well be naked at work. I feel alone, isolated, and anxious.

Normally we have this really wonderful system. Every 5 minutes it checks for new e-mails and if I have one, it lets me know with a little "ping" sound. I love the "ping". I need the "ping".

I'm sure that somewhere in the building, or in the district office, someone is running around like a chicken with thier head cut off trying to fix this. I wish I could help.... I wish I could do something!

Friday, May 13, 2005

blogging milestone

Today I commented on a blog that wasn't Jamie's. (Althought Jamie is my sister, and I love her, commenting on her blog is a must, no biggie!)

I have been thinking for some time about commenting on DGM's blog. His stories really crack me up and make my day better. So today I did. I'm a little disappointed with what I said, but if I gush, I show the lameass that I truly am! I wasn't ready for that on a first comment.

Someday I hope to comment on Dooce. Then my blogging life will be complete!

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Long time no blog

Hello to all my faithful readers!

I've missed the 4 of you! :-)

Seriously it has been a long time since I've posted anything. I will just start by saying that I finally have time to breathe! Grad class is over for a few weeks, work is settling down, the play is over (Did I tell you I volunteered to help choreograph a play? What was I thinking?), and I am not sick everyday. Did you hear that! The morning sickness finally is giving me a break!!!!!!!! YAHOOOOOOOO!!!!!! (Now that I've written that, it might come to punish me but I'll take the chance).

More recently in our house was one of the busiest mothers day's I've ever seen. Basically it consisted of family (extended family) from 9:30 in the morning until 9 at night! STRAIGHT! Now, as much as I love my family and enjoy spending time with them... I might just have to insist on a more quiet mothers day next year. All I really wanted was a quiet day at home with Adam and Bri but because my mom and Denise wanted gatherings... I went along. Now, don't get me wrong, I loved the gathering(s) while I was there but it left me very tired and wasn't really my choice of a day. Besides the fact that my husband got me nothing. That's right, nothing! No card, no gift, nothing! I'm not sure he even really realized it until at about 9:30, as we were getting ready for bed, I said to him... "Really, so I'm not getting anything?" And he sheepishly replied... "Well I had something in mind but I didn't get a chance..."

I'm not really seriously wounded or anything but a card would have been nice!

Well, I will leave more topics for later days such as.... Why I hate morning thunderstorms and how 1 minute can change a woman's life.

Thursday, April 28, 2005

I guess I'm catching up

I finally figured out today... I am a suburban mom.

I have always had a hard time viewing myself from the outside and seeing all the pieces as whole. However, today for some reason, I began to see myself as a suburban mom.

I have lived in the suburbs all my life, that should be nothing new. I've been a mom for almost 2 years, that should be nothing new. I've worked as a teacher for 4 years, nothing new. I've driven my SUV over 40,000 miles in 3 years, nothing new.

I'm not sure I can put my finger on why, before today, it did not occur to me that I am a classic suburban mom. It won't be long before I'm off to soccer practice and dance classes and making sloppy joes for dinner.

I feel old today.

Thank you

Thank you to Jamie who taught me how to fix my blog problem!

Thank you to my sick days that I've accumulated for allowing me to take yesterday off to do laundry and read a cheap novel!

Thank you to Brianna who melts my heart when she says thank you in the morning after I tear off a piece of my Egg Mc Muffin (the muffin only) to give to her.

Thank you to Adam who has been super-dad this week so that I could attend a lot of nearly pointless meetings and dance rehearsals that go no where!

On to other things...

I was asked to co-lead a meeting tomorrow on our teacher institute day. (YES! Teachers actually do work on those days!)

On one hand, I feel that this is a wonderful opportunity and I am honored that they trust me to help lead 30 of my co-workers in the right(?) direction. Since I am training to be a school administrator, this is something I really want to do well. And I think I can do it well.

On the other hand, I feel like I have to defend myself to my slacker co-workers at the same time. These people are my good friends and they just don't understand my ambition to be seen as a value to my school building. They are happy just hiding in their classrooms and not doing more than the minimum outside of that. These people tease me for caring about the running of the school and the decisions made. And I feel that I have to defend myself to them. Why is that? Why do I need to pretend that I'm not proud of being chosen, to stress the fact that I really wasn't given a choice in the matter.

Is this my insecurity or their selfishness as friends?

Friday, April 22, 2005

blogging vacation

I may not be blogging much right now... not that I was real often before but...

1. Blogger will not let me view my own site right now, everytime I try, I get sent to the dashboard, not the site itself. Weird, and a little discouraging.

2. We have blogging ring at our school! The kids are now into blogs and are being somewhat dangerous and inappropriate in the information they are sharing. SO- Blogs are being monitored all over our building to see how the kids are managing to update them from school and just to make sure our kids are safe. SO- I hope this one won't get me in trouble, Blogger is not being monitored that I know of, our kids are using something called, so that is being blocked currently. Still, I feel a little unsafe blogging from school right now.

I hope to be back with you soon, or find more energy to blog from home.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Beautiful Brianna

Today, I dressed Brianna with all the preppy-ness I just can't seem to manage for myself! Her little pink "Izod" style shirt, whose collar just won't lay down for some reason, and her little white shorts looked adorable with her matching pink scrunch socks and white keds!

I couldn't resist!

She woke up this morning and proceeded to refuse to leave her crib until she could show me her blanket. Now, I have seen this blanket every day for almost 2 years now! I couldn't figure out why this was so important... then, through my own early morning haze, I realized she was actually saying blanket. She didn't care about showing me the blanket, except that she was showing me that she could say it's name.!!!!!!

I'm so proud.... Harvard, here we come!

Thursday, April 14, 2005

I am a lucky girl

My husband loves me even though I am sick and cranky all the time!

My Daughter loves me and doesn't want to leave me... except at night when she asks to go to bed when she is tired. ( Parents will understand how amazing that is!)

My Mother loves me enough to drive out to my house any time she can to either baby sit or help me get stuff done.

The rest of my family is also wonderful!

particularly today, I feel like a lucky girl because I got away with a lie last night. My law professor assigned us a very big project several weeks ago, which I of course left till the last minute... and then didn't get it done in time to turn in when it was due last Wednesday. SO... yesterday I turned in the finished product and told him that it was in my folder all along and that I was very embarrassed that I had forgotten to turn it in! He gave me a hard time at first, but only in fun. He didn't seem to care at all.

I don't think I will tempt that fate again any time soon!

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Call the men in the white coats

Well, I am trying hard to make this a positive place. I have forbidden myself from talking about sickness or any other unhappy thing right now. So, of course that's all I can think about to write.

Except maybe... I have lots of thoughts on the fact that Britney Spears has just announced that she is pregnant. I don't really know her but I am afraid she will be a horrible mother. She just seems so self-involved, and young. I know lots of people have kids young, but she acts young. And what about Kevin? He just left one woman who was 6 mo pregnant with his child at the time. Several gossip magazines I've read say that he doesn't want children and that this could break up their marriage. I don't really care except that it is one thing to bring a child into a strong marriage... it can be tough... but if one person isn't happy about it. What will happen then?

One of my strangest thoughts is that maybe I should e-mail Britany! If she's just announcing it now, she's probably within a few weeks of my due date and maybe she would like another pregnant girl to hash things out with. This is where the men in the white coats should come and take me away. Do I actually think that she would read my e-mail and want to be pen pals or something? Well, no, not really, which is why I'd never actually do it... but I've seriously considered it.

Which maybe means that actually I want another pregnant person to talk to. My friends and family are great about listening and trying to understand but there is just no substitute for a friend who is close to your due date who can REALLY understand and offer advice that might actually work. I love my mom, and my friends, but they either haven't been pregnant, or not for over 25 years! They don't really know how to help, or that maybe I don't need help, I just need them to nod and say "Oh" or "that's too bad" at all the right times. Another pregnant woman would understand that.

Call in the straight jacket... I'm really loosin' it today!

Thursday, April 07, 2005

At Jamie's request

In just a moment I will tell you all a story that Jamie assured me is perfect Blog material.

First, let me say... 1. This is my first post from home! 2. I decided to stay home and rest today, I am proud of my decision. It wasn't my most responsible decision ever, but I feel better than I have in over a week.

Now... On to Jamie's new favorite story....

Jamie and I were talking on the phone last night and all of a sudden she had to stop to tell Doc to stop licking the couch. This prompted me to assure her that that was nothing. Tuesday afterschool I had taken a nap to try and feel better. Adam had taken Brianna away to play for the most lovely hour nap on the couch, all curled up under one of those knit blankets... Anyway, I was just waking up when they came back. Brianna saw that my eyes were open and rushed right over to get my attention. Well, I must not have been quick enough to give her my full, undivided, fully awake attention. She decided to head butt me in the shoulder. This is not an evil act, it is her way of hugging/cuddling. Well, she stayed that way for a moment and I thought it was very sweet... Until I looked down at her and she was licking the blanket!

In my horror that she was licking the "icky" blanket, I pushed her little chest back until she could no longer reach the blanket with her abnormally long, pointy tongue (which has previously been compared to Gene Simmons). She thought this was now hysterical. She leaned back in to lick the blanket some more after giving me a look that clearly said "mom, you are ridiculous and I am going to lick this blanket just so you push me back again." We went on like this for several minutes. She would lick the blanket, I would push her back, she would give me her devilish smile, and we were at it again.

Its amazing how often babies and toddler stories are similar to dog stories!

(EVen as I type this... she is licking a piece of paper that I've just had to confiscate!)

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Update (read my earlier post first)

After a small snack, and some moderate work, I am feeling slightly better. I have also come to the conclusion that there is no way Hades is going to freeze over in time for me to get all my grad school work done for tonight, SO, I'm just going to do as much as I can and take my lumps if he decides not to be generous when I tell him it's not all done.

I'm still pondering the thing about work tomorrow....

PS- notice how I seem to have tons of time to update my blog not once, but at least twice, and still not get significant amounts of other work done! Is spring here or What!

Not really "lovin' it"

Today am definitely NOT "lovin' it". I feel like sh*t on a stick. I have 12 hours of work to do and only 6 hours to do it in. I have grad class tonight. I won't see Bri (or Adam) until they are tired and cranky. I'm hungry. I'm nauseous.


maybe I'll stay home from work tomorrow... Don't remind me that I've just had 10 days off... I am stressed and tired and that makes me sick and the only way to get un-sick is to sleep and I don't have time to sleep....Unless I take tomorrow off work. I'm going to keep pondering this one....

Monday, April 04, 2005

New product

I was recently SO SICK of drinking ice water that I decided to try a new product...

Crystal Light now makes single serving pouches made to be mixed with a bottle of water, have you seen these commercials? SO, you just put the tiny pouch into your purse, then when you inevitably buy your bottle of water at some point in your day, you dump the little package in, shake, and voila! Yummy, flavored water, with only 5 calories.

They currently have 4 flavors; Ice Tea, Lemonade, Peach Lemonade, and (my fav.) Raspberry Ice.

I highly recommend this treat. Obviously I am ridiculously excited about this, excited enough to ramble on for way too long on the blog...

so much to say

Well, It's been a while... Last week my family took a very nice trip out to southern Arizona to visit Adam's parents. While we enjoyed our four days in the sun and with his parents, and there were many things that I enjoyed about it, there are several things I DID NOT enjoy that I now need to get off my chest.

1. The plane ride down in which we forgot a passifier and Brianna fussed/cried/screamed the entire 3 hours.
2. My sunburn, enough said.
3. No alone time... thus is the nature of a family vacation but still a negative
4. The trip home... for several reasons;
a. I was already feeling sick, but landings really kill me
b. a layover in Denver
c. a 1hr 20 min delay in Denver
d. not leaving Denver until 11:00 Denver time, thats MIDNIGHT in Chicago
e. landing in Chicago at 1:58 only to have the daylight savings time change make it 3:15 by
the time we got to baggage claim.
f. puking my guts out on the side of 294 at about 4 in the morning. (morning sickness +
tired+ 2 plane rides + airport food)

I think now I will go reflect on how I'm supposed to be feeling better after a nice relaxing vacation but instead feel more tired and especially ill this morning.

Thursday, March 24, 2005

Good morning

Have you ever thought about the duality of that phrase?

This morning I can wish you all a "good morning" because I am having a "good morning". Have you ever wished someone that particular greeting and then stopped and thought.... Why do I care if their morning is good, mine sucks and theirs should too! That's how I feel some mornings, but not today... And I digress!

Today Brianna didn't cry when I left her at day care. This is the second day in a row for that and it fills my heart with joy. I know she has not come to the realization that she has to go there whether she likes it or not and she should just make the best of it. I think she has actually come to like her teachers and friends (most of the time). She was still clingy, and not too happy with me, but she didn't cry.

Of course now we are going to start spring break this afternoon! She will have 10 glorious days with her parents (and we will be overjoyed to be with her). However, on the dreaded April 4, we will all have to go back to our "normal" routine. And my money is on the crying starting back up again. But I see the light at the end of the tunnel so to speak.

So, as I sit here at my computer, killing time, not doing the work I should be, planning my vacation and pedicure today, I wish you all a really good morning because if I get to have one you should too.

Monday, March 21, 2005


Thank you to Jamie and Heather for reading my blog!

and James... I knew you would sympathize with the Diet Coke thing.

If I don't find something other than water... I will soon grow gills!
UGH! Ideally, only 2 more weeks of feeling this awful all the time.

I punish myself!

Today I am giving up my normal lunch with my co-workers.... To work!

I just can't seem to get anything done in a timely basis these days. So, I am going to have to sacrifice my hour of complaining and sympathy to actually get some work done in my classroom. Don't worry, I have no plans to make this anti-social behavior a standard. We have open house this Wed. night and I just have too many things to do between now and then.

I have high hopes that this dedication to getting stuff done will pay off so I don't have to repeat this lonely act afterschool today, or Heaven Forbid! during lunch again tomorrow!

Wish me luck and send some focusing waves my way!

Thursday, March 17, 2005

Last time I checked....

Isn't it March 17th? The middle of March? The month of spring rains and budding flowers?


It has been snowing here all morning and is actually accumulating. I look out my window and feel January all over again.



So now that I have decided to tell you all about this absolute miracle that doubles as a temporary form of torture, here is the first thoughts.

I am nauseous, ALL THE TIME. I have found that the only thing that helps alleviate this even a little is eating about every hour and a half. While this, in the past, would have been a dream come true for me, it is actually more like torture. I have to eat very certain foods, in small amounts, and I have to be careful to keep a balance between solids and liquids or my stomach becomes double upset... And any liquids have to be ice cold or my stomach doesn't handle that well either. AND I CAN'T DRINK DIET COKE! I had already cut down to caffeine free for most of the day, but now I can't have any of it, my stomach doesn't approve of even little sips!

Problems with this... I work in a school where I don't actually get breaks on an as needed basis, and they aren't really scheduled on my new grazing schedule. Also, there is very little food available here that actually works for me right now so I have to plan out 3-5 snacks before I leave the house every morning. Lastly, there is no ice available in the entire building. So, either have to buy a new cold water from the vending machines about every hour OR, now I have found that I can get a big thermos of ice ready in the morning and use it as it slowly melts all day long.

My morning routine has more than doubled! I pack less stuff for my toddler than I do for myself when leaving the house now!

Start Spreading the News....

I really am not ready to say this to all of you.... but then agian, Jamie is the only one that reads this and she already knows....I'M PREGNANT. I have been trying to hold it in from the greater world for a month now, and just can't make it the three more weeks until it's "safe" to spread the news officially. If you actually know me... just don't say anything to my work place yet, OK?

It is fairly safe to say that this blog will now become a regular series of entries about how I feel, how my body changes, and the fears of being a mother. I am going to use Dooce and some of our other old favorites as inspiration. I will now be a no holds barred, open woman who tells you WAY too much information about myself but if you read this, you know what you're in for!

I am very excited to have this new outlet for my complaints and joys!
Watch out world, Pregnant woman on the way!

Friday, March 04, 2005

Brains of Swiss cheese

I have recently discovered that my brain is made of Swiss cheese. I think that I have taken on SO much in my life, that instead of enriching my knowledge base, it is drawing away from my ability to do simple things like remember appointments.

As it is, I think I may need to scream!

What do you think my students would do if right now, in the middle of class, I started a deep primal scream?

Thursday, February 24, 2005

Today, I worked at work!

Oh productivity... let me count the ways,

Today I:
1. Finished ALL the grading I had waiting for me.
2. Taught 4 adequate lessons which kept the children entertained and engaged.
3. Updated my computer gradebook so that I could...
4. Provide each family with an updated grade next week.
5. I returned parent phone calls!
6. I cleaned up the clutter in my classroom.
7. I planned my next MONTH of lessons
8. I'm updating my blog
9. I'm going to sit through 5 hours of conferences tonight
10. I'm going to be painfully sweet rather than say the things actually going through my head.
11. I will get home in time to play with Bri and relax with nothing left to worry about for tomorrow! Isn't that the best of all!

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

Valentines day

Well, this week I woke up Monday morning wishing the week were over. What does that tell you about my state of mind, and the week I have planned?!?

We have decided on a very nice Valentines day tradition that I think I will share with the group. Yesterday, Adam got his Valentines day. He got to do the day the way he wanted, in his sweatpants, watching TV and playing on the computer, where I brought him his favorite Subway sub. Tonight I will get my Valentines day. A nice family dinner at my favorite restaraunt where I eat appetizers and dessert, no real dinner.

Don't feel like I got shafted because I had to wait and he went first... we called my favorite restaraunt last night and just did not feel up to the HOUR AND 15 MIN. wait to be seated. Since they don't take reservations, we figure tonight we'll have a better chance.

All in all, a happy holiday!

PS- re: my picture below-- I am no longer blonde, I have gone to a more natural light brown/auburn shade that I love.

This is me!

B&W joey
Originally uploaded by josharow.
If you ever wanted to know too much about me, here you go! Here are my answers to some questions about my life!

2. What time did you wake up this morning? 4:45 and then every 7 min after that until 5:30ish

3. What did you have for breakfast? half of a peanut butter sandwich

4. Name as it appears on birth certificate: Johanna Kate Johnson

5 Nicknames: Joey, Josh, Jo Kate

6. Piercings: only in my ears

7. Eye color: Hazel

8. Place of birth: Gainesville, GA

9. Favorite food: lately, Hamburgers

10. What foods do you dislike? most fish

11. What is your favorite chip flavor? Nacho Doritos

12. What is your favorite CD at the moment? Phil Vasser

13. Favorite sandwich? at home- Plain Peanut Butter.... Away- meatball

14. What kind of car do you drive? Ford Escape

15. Favorite item of clothing? Loose jeans, sweatshirt, bare feet

16. Ever been to Africa? No

17. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go? Greece, or Hawaii

18. What color is your bathroom? White walls with green and blue accents

19. Color is your bedroom carpet? Blue, but I did not pick it out and hope to get rid of it someday

20. Favorite brand of clothing? whatever fits and makes me look thinner

21. Where would you retire to? southern CA

22. Favorite time of day? Night time, that is if I don't have grading to do.

23. What was your most memorable birthday? 18- In the Bahamas. Where you can gamble at 18!

24. Favorite sport to watch? Football

25. What fabric detergent do you use? Cheer Free

26. What characteristics do you despise? People who complain about things that are their own darn fault

27. Coke or Pepsi? diet coke- caffiene free

28. Ever been toilet papering? sadly, no

29. Love someone so much it made you cry? Yes.

30. Been in a car accident? One bad, one minor.

31. Croutons or bacon bits: bacon bits

32. Favorite day of the week: Whichever weekend day I have nothing planned

33. Favorite restaurant: Red Lobster or Olive Garden

34. Favorite fast food restaurant: Mc Donalds

35. Favorite flower: Roses

36. Diamonds or pearl: DIAMONDS

37. Favorite drink: strawberry daquari

38. Favorite ice cream: Chocolate with fudge or brownie bits

39. Disney or Warner Bros.? Disney

40. How many times did you fail your driver's test? 0, but I should have!

41. Before this one, from whom did you get your last e-mail? A parent at work :-(

42. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card? H & M

43 What do you do most often when you are bored? eat, watch TV, sometimes at the same time.

44. Bed time: somewhere between 9:30 and 11:00

47. Favorite TV shows: CSI, Lost, Desperate Housewives

48. Last person you went out to dinner with: Adam and My parents

49. Ford or Chevy? we own one of each

50. What are you listening to right now? My students packing up their books

51. What is your favorite color? Red...

52. Lake, ocean or river? Ocean

53. How many tattoos do you have? Zero.

54. Have you ever run out of gas? No.

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Irony sucks

Isn't it ironic (don't start singing...) that the one week I can't possibly have time to relax, or be sick, That I of course get sick. I feel like crap, I'm loosing my voice, and my throat hurts like I have a truck full of tacks trying to get down it.

On top of that, Brianna has been sick. She's had a runny nose (which is really no big deal) but then that progressed to pink eye! And now, like me she seems to be having a hard time swallowing and feels the need to cough a lot. I do mean A LOT! She coughed on and off for an hour this morning. And not little discreet, look at me mom, type coughing. Actual hacking coughs that make me cringe and want to cry for her, while simultaneously holding her as close as I can while praying she doesn't puke all over me.

Wednesday, February 02, 2005

I learned how to enter pictures!

Originally uploaded by josharow.
So it turns out that Mac's suck for blogging! But- I found a way to put pictures up.

This was our snapshot that took first place on Sunday.

Just Plain Crazy

Well, since we last "spoke" I have sabotaged myself yet again.

Friday my students turned in a research paper they have been working on....Let's see.... 99 research papers x about 10 min. each to grade= almost 17 hours of grading! I bet you never looked at it that way when you were a student did you?

So I should have spent every spare minute reading papers over the weekend right? NOPE! Didn't read a single one. Saturday, had a lovely day just playing with Bri and vegging out on the couch. Sunday... Well, Sunday I'll get to in a minute. SO ANYWAY- I took Monday off work and graded papers all day long (sort of) and I got through a little over half of them. Now it's Wednesday, and here I am typing this instead of grading.... I am just plain crazy!

SUNDAY- On Sunday we decided that since we didn't have anything better to do, we would enter Brianna in a Beautiful Baby Contest. Literally, we decided based on the fact that we had nothing else that day, it was just something to do. We never thought anything would come of it...
4 trophies!

-Best Snapshot
-Best Smile
-4th runner up girls age 15-23 mo.

-Overall point total winner age 15-23 mo.

Before you think I've gone all Patsy Ramsey.... This is a natural baby contest with advertising as it's ultimate goal. That means, NO makeup or pageant tricks. They want natural babies/toddlers who have personality. NOT tricked out pageant kids with coaches and angry moms!

So all in all... Crazy as usual, but fun all the same !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

at home
Originally uploaded by josharow.

Thursday, January 27, 2005

Why I love my life

Yesterday was a perfect day! My work day was relatively easy and without trauma. I worked one-on-one with a fabulous student who learned an entire dance in a half an hour, even though she is not a dancer by nature. It's not the best dance I've ever created, but it fits the play well and I am proud of it. Then I went to McDonald's and had a very peaceful, fattening, dinner by myself. (Which I thoroughly enjoyed! Sometimes I like being by myself). OK- going on, I went to grad class, participated in some lively discussion that reaffirmed my desire to progress down this particular career path, and even got done early! So I got home in time to hold Brianna, play with her, and watch my favorite TV shows!

The one kink in the day was that as I tried to put Bri to bed early, which she sorely needed!, it seems that her crib rail fell off it's sliding track! I have no idea how such a thing happened, and we were only able to make it worse last night when we tried to fix it.... But we (Adam) came up with a good temporary solution and I'm sure we will manage to get it fixed this weekend.

But all in all, Yesterday, just when I needed it, showed me that I can be crazy busy, and still love it! SOMETIMES!

Wednesday, January 26, 2005


Why do I take on so much stuff? Is it because my mom always did and I think I should? Is it because I want to feel important? or needed? Why isn't it enough that I have a happy family? do I really need less time at home? I think hard before taking something on, I know it's side effects, but I still do more and more stuff! WHY?

Monday, January 24, 2005

far too long

Well, I suppose it's about time I get my butt in gear and get a post up.

It has been a very long couple of weeks around here. Adam's grandmother passed away on the 13th so we flew out to California for a long weekend to attend the services. Now, while there are definite benefits to being in San Francisco on a weekend it is below 10 degrees in Chicago, It was not a good weekend.

Saturday we spent over 7 hours on a plane, with a very active 19 mo. old! It's only supposed to be a 4 1/2 hour flight but we had over 2 hours of delays. (Never Fly United!) The day was punctuated by Brianna's very first temper tantrum, complete with head thrashing, arched back, and hard kicking legs. Why a temper tantrum.... because her parents (and the airline) insisted that she be strapped into her seat during take off.

Sunday, services, all day. If you've never been to a Jewish funeral (and I hadn't prior to Sun.) it is very intense. I've been to numerous Christian funerals but this was so much more intense. We actually had to help shovel the dirt on to the coffin. It was a very touching ceremony and has wonderful sentiment behind it, but it was so much more final than what I was used to. (Which basically included walking away and trusting that someone else took care of lowering the coffin and covering it, etc.) I've said it before, I'll say it again, VERY intense.

After that, Brianna was really sick the whole of Monday, and Tuesday was another flying day, better this time but still really exhausting!

Since then, we've just been trying to recover mentally and physically. We had a very nice weekend of doing nothing this weekend. Well, nothing but shoveling out our driveway every few hours. We received more than 11 inches of snow this weekend! UGH! The piles are so high on some street corners that you can't see traffic coming, eek!

All in all, I'm busy as usual (see title of site!) but really not lovin' it right now!

Tuesday, January 11, 2005


I was reading Jamie's blog today and she was thinking about her regrets like never going for her childhood dream of being a ballerina... and it got me thinking...

I regret a lot of things in my life. It's not that I am an unhappy person, because I'm not. You'll just have to take my word for it. I love my family and my career. I have enough material things. But it doesn't stop me from having regrets.

I regret not continuing as a dancer. I wasn't very good but I loved how I felt when I danced. I don't get that same feeling anymore because I've let my skills slide so far.

All my regrets about my earlier life really center around the lack of self-confidence I had. I've never been a real outgoing person, I would even classify myself as shy. I always seemed to reach a point in my activites where I no longer felt good enough to continue; Dance, Judging, Coaching, Dating. Thank God my husband came along when he did!

These days I worry more about what I will regret later. If I become a stay-at-home mom, will I regret not teaching or being a principal? If I become a principal, will I regret the time lost with my kids? If I spend my money on blank will I be sorry later? What if I don't buy it?

I have a lot to think about!

Friday, January 07, 2005


Since I primarily use the computer at work... and it won't let me download the necessary stuff... no pictures!

general random thoughts

Today I just need to get out some general random thoughts! I'm not going to spell check and I refuse to edit myself today.

1. We had a huge snow fall this week here in Chicagoland and as a teacher, I had every finger, toe, and other extremity crossed hoping for a day off... no dice! Despite the fact that my 25 min drive took almost an hour (due to horrible road conditions) and our district had several minor bus accidents (due to ice), no day off for me! Now, if your not a teacher, you are already thinking that I get plenty of days off and why do I need another one for goodness sake? WELL, I DO! It's not like I can just take a day off whenever I please. In your job, if your not there, the work just waits for you until you get back, or someone else does it and it doesn't matter. Thats not how it works for teachers. If I take a day off, I have to plan ahead all the work I would have done that day and leave copious notes so someone who isn't a teacher can attemp to do all the things I have been trained to do. And THEN- I have to re-do parts of it when I return to make sure it was done right so I can successfully go on to the next hundred things I have to do. UGH- Why didn't I become a banker or some kind of corporate person? I need to win the lottery or something and take a year off.

Which leads me to:
2. I just got to spend the most amazing two weeks with my daughter. I forget sometimes how much happens in the 8-9 hours I'm at work everyday! Now that we are all back in our work/daycare routine, I miss her horribly all day long. I pains me to hear all the wonderful things she did each day because, while I'm happy she did them and that she had a happy day, I missed it.

3. Yesterday, I missed the first time she played in snow! I can't really blame the babysitter, all the kids were outside playing in it, she couldn't make my daughter stay inside just because I wasn't there to photograph or video tape this big event. I'm really sad. I hope the rain holds off long enough to atleast get a second snow experience on tape this Sat.

4. Why do they make white gloves for children? I purchased this adorable little rose colored jacket for Bri (my daughter) and with it's light pink roses, it just seemed to need this cute little winter white gloves. I know rookie mistake right... any experienced moms could have told me this was a bad idea, but I didn't know! But why do they make gloves that after 10 min in the snow look like the've been run over by 10 dirty semi-trucks? This weekend I'm going to find a snowsuit that will go with black gloves! Or maybe I should just finish off the white ones and dye them.... hmmmm

ENOUGH! I'm going to spend my spare time today teaching myself how to add pictures and links to this site. It's time for me to get my butt into gear and be a more active part of the blogging community.

Tuesday, January 04, 2005

Happy New Year!

Perhaps it is a little later than normally accepted, but Happy New Year to you all. I hope your holidays were as wonderful as you wanted them to be.

I am back at work after a restful, but never long enough, break from school. We had a wonderful Christmas with my family, I had a lovely relaxing, but fun, birthday, and our New Years was uneventful.... just the way we like it.

Our biggest accomplishment over the last week or so was completely re-organizing one of our rooms so that we could have a play room. It became painfully clear to us as we were driving home from Christmas with my family, unable to see out the windows of the SUV thanks to piles of presents and toys, that we need more storage.

People had always warned me that as babies grow into toddlers, the toys get bigger along with the child... I now completely believe them! We were already quite tired of the entire family room being taken over by toys of all sizes, and that was before Christmas! We are now petrified... and quite convinced that toys reproduce themselves when the owners are sleeping. There is something about blocks and LEGOS and "pop-onz" that I have now discovered, no scientist will ever be able to prove it, but toys really can reproduce. I am quite sure that in a very "Nutcracker" type way, that they come alive at night and have merry little dances and such.

Regardless, Thank you to all of our loving family for your generosity. Brianna can now fully compete for the "Most Spolied Toddler in the World" award. She may not understand how lucky she is (at least not for longer than her 90 second attention span!) but her parents truely do and we love you all for loving us that much.